Tag: friendship

Weaving Our Tapestries of Connection

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“Relations are like electric currents. Wrong connections will give you shocks throughout your life. But the right ones light up your life. ” – unknown

I didn’t realize that I was pulling a loose thread in my life until we landed in France on our recent trip. But I teared up when I was explaining to our friends there that I felt compelled to visit them so that Miss O could know a little bit about what their son’s life was in France. I continued on to say that I believed that it would be easier for their son to come home to start middle school if at least one other friend had seen where he’d been.

Miss O and their older son had been in every class together from ages three through seven when the family moved to France. And then we saw them every summer when they’d come to visit so Mr. D got to know their younger son too.

I didn’t take me long to puzzle out my tears. When my family moved back from the Philippines to the States I was almost seven-years-old. It wasn’t long into trying to make friends at Jefferson Elementary when I heard kids teasingly jeer, “In the Philippines…” I must have started many sentences that way and it got old – for them and for me. Because the two lives were so different.

I didn’t know it was a loose thread all these years later. But I had an inexplicable certainty that I needed to take my family to France to build a bridge for these kids. If my kids could at least see a bit of where these boys had spent four years, perhaps their shift back to school in Seattle could be a bit more integrated.

The parents of these boys told me that one of their sons’ teachers in France counseled them not to talk about their French experience at all with new friends. I understand that advice but also know that we suffer a cramping of spirit when we bottle ourselves up like that.

Then we traveled on from France to our friends in England. Five years ago, this English family moved from London to our street in the States. Our kids went to school together and traveled back and forth between houses in a constant rotation. After four years of life in America it was time for them to move back. They settled into a delightful little village in Southwest England.

We had so much fun visiting our English friends a year after they left Seattle. In one especially poignant moment, I found all the kids huddled around the school yearbook we’d brought for them. The kids were so interested in seeing how everyone looked and hearing stories of what had happened since they’d left. When it was time for us to leave after two nights, there were tears on all sides. The mom of the family told her kids, “See, I told you your American friends would come visit.”

When I heard that, the tears welled up in me again. A feeling overcame me that was similar to when I see stories of long-lost friends reuniting, or blogger friends meeting in person. We are all more connected than we think. And when we honor the threads that bind us, we help complete each other’s tapestries in a beautiful way.

(featured photo from Pexels))

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram @wynneleon

Please check out the The Life of Try podcast Where trying becomes the spark for personal growth, discovery, and re-invention!

Support Without Pressure: Why Effort Matters More Than Results

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“Give light and people will find the way.” – Ella Baker

The other day, my six-year-old son, Mr. D, announced that he wasn’t going back to finish out the last 12 days of first grade. After some delicate probing, I discovered he was worried about a math test.

It’s hard to know what to say to help in a situation like that, isn’t it? And what does real support actually look like—especially when someone is struggling, failing, or figuring things out?

So in this episode of The Life of Try, I explore how to support others without adding pressure, and why focusing on effort instead of outcome can make all the difference.

Whether you’re a parent, coach, friend, or teammate, it’s easy to unintentionally turn encouragement into expectations. But research—and stories from figures like basketball coach John Wooden and psychologist Carol Dweck—show that when we shift our focus to effort, persistence, and growth, we help people stay in the process longer and build real resilience.

This episode dives into:

  • Why it’s often harder to watch someone try than to try ourselves
  • How subtle signals can create pressure without us realizing it
  • The difference between encouragement and expectation
  • How to support kids, friends, and colleagues in a way that builds confidence and persistence
  • Practical ways to reinforce effort, not just results

And fortunately this research helped provide me a roadmap to help with Mr. D’s math test. I reminded him that he’d already done the work and practice and so the test was just like a baseball game. All he had to do was do his best.

If you’ve ever wondered how to truly support someone you care about—especially when things aren’t going well—this episode offers a powerful reframe. Because sometimes the best support isn’t helping someone succeed… …it’s helping them keep going.

Here are some other ways you can listen and watch this episode:

The Power of Looking At Your Life Through a New Lens – The Life of Try: Personal growth, one try at a time.

How do the stories we inherit from our families shape who we become—and how can we rewrite those stories with more compassion, courage, and purpose?In this episode of The Life of Try, Wynne Leon talks with Jennifer Griffith, author of Both Sides of Then and host of the podcast About Your Mother, about inherited family stories, hidden shame, resilience, motherhood, memoir writing, and the healing power of bringing secrets into the light.Jennifer shares how learning her mother’s story changed the way she understood her own identity, why family history can influence the way we parent and see ourselves, and how her LENS framework helps people revisit old narratives, look at them from a new perspective, and use those stories for good.This thoughtful conversation explores family secrets, legacy, forgiveness, generational stories, personal growth, writing a memoir, and what it means to keep trying when a story is still unfolding.Key Takeaways:- We all inherit stories—and they shape how we see ourselves.Jennifer reminds us that family history, secrets, wounds, and even everyday phrases from our parents can quietly influence our identity, choices, and relationships.- Seeing our parents as people can create compassion and clarity.When we understand the experiences, pain, and resilience that shaped our parents, we can better understand ourselves—and begin to loosen the grip of old assumptions.- Shame loses power when it is brought into the light.Family secrets can create distance, but honest storytelling—shared with care and appropriate boundaries—can create healing, connection, and freedom.- A new lens can help us rewrite old narratives.Jennifer’s LENS framework encourages us to listen to the stories we repeat, engage with them, narrate them from multiple perspectives, and step out of them so we can use them for good.- Trying again often means slowing down and letting the work become ready.- Jennifer’s story about being told “you’re not ready” became a powerful lesson in patience, humility, and the creative courage required to keep going.📘 Order Both Sides of Then: Finding Love After Abandonment: 🌐 Show notes and more inspiration: https://wynneleon.com🔔 Subscribe to The Life of Try for more conversations on:personal growth, creativity, reinvention, resilience, writing, and mindset.📌 Subscribe to The Life of Try on YouTube & Stay Updated: → https://www.youtube.com/@thelifeoftry?sub_confirmation=1ABOUT MEHi, I’m Wynne Leon — host of The Life of Try, a personal growth and self-improvement podcast exploring resilience, reinvention, uncertainty, and the courage to keep trying.Through thoughtful interviews, reflective conversations, and real-life stories, I share insights to help you navigate change, get unstuck, and move forward with more intention.🌍 Website: https://wynneleon.com━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━🎥 Watch NextHow to Tell Relatable StoriesThe Quiet Mindset Shifts that Changes Everything | Mindfulness & Personal Growth with Joseph SchmidtHow to Embrace What Makes You Different | Finding Your Purpose with Kym Gordon Moore
  1. The Power of Looking At Your Life Through a New Lens
  2. How To Tell Relatable Stories About Life
  3. Why Second Place Might Be Preparation, Not Failure
  4. When Your Plan Falls Apart | How to Stay Resilient and Keep Trying
  5. Barbara Nickless on A Voice In The Dark, Online Gaming and The Power of Story

Links for this episode:

Other Episodes you Might Enjoy:

⁠ Letting Go Of Outcomes: The Mindset That Keeps You Moving⁠

4⁠8: How to Get Unstuck: Michael Yang on Saying Yes, Resilience and Coming Alive⁠

⁠How to Reclaim Fun in Adult Life | Mike Rucker, PhD, on Joy, Burnout and the Fun Habit⁠

(featured photo from Pexels)

The Long View of Life

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“A heart that loves is always young.” – Greek Proverb

My kids and I attended a memorial service for a 98-year-old friend, Jean, this past weekend. There is a lot of life to honor when someone lives that long.

It’s tempting to do it by what she did: she was a mother to four children, a member of her church for more than 70 years, she was an elementary school teacher, and when she retired from teaching, chose to work at the information booth at the local mall for more than 20 years.

Or by what she loved: she loved to play bridge and to cook. She cooked for the church youth group every week for 4 years and then published a cookbook of how to feed large groups.

But what struck me most was the quality of her relationships. She made friends wherever she went. In fact, I didn’t get to know her well until she was in her 90’s. Jean made the effort to reach out to me with little things she passed along from her family to my kids. I wrote a post about her in 2021 when she gave me a copy of the cookbook she published in the 1980’s. There was a woman at the service who had been a friend of Jean’s for 94 years.

But Jean’s life wasn’t just a walk in the park. Forty years ago, one of her daughters was murdered by a stalker when she was in her late 20’s. Going through that ordeal was when Jean got to know my dad so I know she forged relationships in good times and in bad.

Here’s what I loved about going to Jean’s service. It was a reminder to me that even when life seems complicated, messy and hard, we make it through because of the relationships we build. And it’s never too late.

(featured photo from Pexels)

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram @wynneleon

Please check out the How to Share podcast, a podcast where guests share what they’ve lived and learned!

The Ripple Effect

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“I cannot do all the good that the world needs, but the world needs all the good that I can do.” – Jana Stanfield

Last week, six-year-old Mr. D came home from school and wanted to type a message on my computer. It read,

“Art is so so so so so so fun bcus I em duing clay today.”

Mr. D is less voluble than his older sister so I loved hearing about what he was excited about at school. But I was tired after a long day and busy with getting dinner on the table so I almost let it drop there.

By chance, I snapped a picture of his message and after the kids went to bed, sent it to the art teacher.

The next morning she responded, “I really appreciate you letting me know this! Thank you so much providing a clay experience for the whole school is arduous so your message means a lot.”

That made me feel great for making the effort.

Then, the art teacher thanked Mr. D for the message.

And that led to Mr. D coming home and writing a nice note for his teacher, the gym teacher, the music teacher and the librarian and distributing them the next day.

I love the ripple effect.

Especially when paired with synchronicity. I was writing this post when I read Vicki Atkinson’s beautiful post, Power of the Pen. In it she so eloquently captures the beautiful impact of receiving heartfelt notes. She also connected the dots to a How to Share podcast with Amy Weinland Daughters about writing letters.

I hadn’t made the connection between Mr. D’s notes and Amy’s wonderful message about how much it means to write people letters so I’m adding another dose of gratitude to the feel good pile. I’m grateful to great friends like Vicki Atkinson that remind us about the goodness we’ve learned!

(featured photo is Mr D on the computer)

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram @wynneleon

Please check out the How to Share podcast, a podcast celebrates the art of teaching, learning, giving, and growing!

Ropes are Relational

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“A friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

I awoke Friday morning to the sound of a drip in my bathroom. Amazing how a drop of water in another room landing on a bath mat that’s designed to absorb water can penetrate the unconscious. It felt like I came abruptly awake and then sat straight up listening. It reminds me of something I heard from acoustic ecologist Gordon Hempton that our ears never sleep, even when our brain does.

The vent on the fan was the source of the leak. So this weekend I got out one of my climbing ropes so that I could do some repair work on the roof. Afterwords, as I was coiling the rope, I was struck by how ropes are like friendship. It takes me a long time to coil a 60 meter rope so perhaps I was just delirious but I don’t think it’s too much of a stretch.

Ropes help us cross dangerous terrain: In the mountains when conditions are icy, steep, or pitted with crevasses, being roped to a team helps ensure safety if someone falls. We know from research, like the longitudinal study that Dr. Robert Wallinger talks about in his TED talk, that friendship has a similar effect. Good relationships keep us happy and healthy.

It’s easier to unkink a rope when it’s not frozen: Ropes, like friendships, get knotted and kinked sometimes. Ropes, like friendships, are easier to unkink when they aren’t frozen. When guides come back into camp after a summit or training exercise, they take care of the ropes right away. Even when the conditions are rough and people are tired and sore, it’s worth the effort to straighten and coil it before it freezes. In my experience, this is true for friendships as well.

Ropes are heavy: Carrying a climbing rope adds around 10 pounds to your pack, more if the rope is wet. When my friends and I climbed together, we’d divvy up the group gear to spread the load. But often when a climber isn’t feeling well, a team member will carry the rope for them. In my experience of good friendships, the same thing happens with carrying the weight of the relationship. Often, it isn’t a completely equitable split of time and effort that makes a friendship work but the willingness of both parties to switch off carrying the load when things get rough or busy.

Here’s the other thing that I love about ropes – they require me to find someone to hold the other end. I tend towards the stubbornly independent so this slows me down enough to get help. As I coiled the rope back up, I also appreciated how reassuring it was to have my mom and sister-in-law there when I roped up to repair the seal around the fan vent. I never slipped or needed the rope to catch me but I knew it was there and it made me feel safer. Just like my friendships.

(featured photo is mine of a rope coiling at the climbing gym)

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram @wynneleon

I host the How to Share podcast, a podcast celebrates the art of teaching, learning, giving, and growing.

I also co-host the Sharing the Heart of the Matter podcast, an author, creator and storytelling podcast with the amazing Vicki Atkinson.

Living Life Fully

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“Some pursue happiness, others create it.” – unknown

Writing a going away card for our neighbors that are moving back to England forced me to put words to what makes them so special. When they moved here three years ago and their kids were 5, 7, and 9 years old, what was most noticeable were their charming accents.

But their charm ran a lot deeper than that. They came to Seattle with a spirit of adventure. The dad’s job allows him to work anywhere in the world. I heard the mom describe their decision making process of looking at the whole globe and choosing Seattle. The water, the mountains, the green drew them in.

So luckily they landed in our neighborhood – right on our street! I met the kids when I was helping out with school picture day as I escorted anyone that was new to the school or out sick on regular picture day down to the photographers. In the process I met these three delightful children who were verbosely happy and excited to be here.

But here’s what was so inspiring about them. They weren’t just happy and adventurous people when they landed. They maintained it for the three years they lived here and by doing so they enraptured our whole community.

I’d see them after a break and they’d have taken a road trip down through Oregon, California, Nevada and back up through Utah, Colorado, Wyoming, and Idaho. The mom would joke that they’d rolled in at 11pm the night before school started again so she wasn’t going to win any Best Mum awards for that.

They did things like climbing to Camp Muir on Mt. Rainier, and spending one holiday at a dude ranch. One holiday they went to Las Vegas and let each of the kids pick a show to see for their night. Then they spent the rest of their time exploring the wilderness near Red Rocks.

It was like without the ruts of having lived in the area long enough to know their favorites, they were free to bounce around and try everything. And the same went for friendship. Not knowing anyone meant that they were open to meeting everyone.

The Buddhists and Stoics talk about contemplating our demise as a way to live more fully. It strikes me that my neighbors exemplified an aspect of this. They likely knew they’d return to England at some point so they lived this adventure to the fullest while they were here.

Here’s what I finally landed on for their going away card. This family with their adventurous, happy and authentic hearts was a gift to us and our community. They reminded us how many wonderful places, experiences and people are around when you are willing to look. And because openness translates to any language, a blessing wherever they go.

May we all be.

(featured photo is mine)

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram @wynneleon

I co-host a author, creator and storytelling podcast with the amazing Vicki Atkinson. To tune in, search for Sharing the Heart of the Matter on Spotify, Apple, Amazon Music or Pocketcasts (and subscribe) or click here. Or the YouTube channel features videos of our interviews. Please subscribe!

My other projects include work as a CEO (Chief Encouragement Officer), speaking about collaboration and AI through the Chicago Writer’s Association, and my book about my journey to find what fueled my dad’s indelible spark and twinkle can be found on Amazon: Finding My Father’s Faith.

A Mini Blog Tour

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“Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real…to be honest…to let our true selves be seen.” – Brene Brown

A few years back I proposed/threatened/promised that I wanted to one day pack my kids and dog into an RV and go on a tour to meet blog buddies. The WordPress community really is so amazing for incredible stories, big hearts and willingness to interact.

While that tour is mostly a fantasy, I’ve been lucky enough to meet so many bloggers through Zoom when we’ve done podcasts. I’ve enjoyed these conversations with people that feel like they are already friends immensely.

On top of that, I’ve been fortunate to meet a number of WordPress friends in person over the years. Playwright Jack Canfora, artist Libby Saylor, Deb (Closer to the Edge blog), and Betsy Kerekes (Writing and Martial Arts blog). Unfortunately, I’ve not yet met my podcast partner and dear friend, Vicki Atkinson (Victoria Ponders blog) in person. But I was lucky enough to meet Vicki’s brilliant and delightful daughter when she came to Seattle.

When the incredible and effervescent Cindy Georgakas (Uniquely Fit blog) said she was coming to the Seattle last weekend, I jumped at the opportunity to spend a few minutes with her as well. My kids, Cooper the dog, and I piled into the car to do a mini blog adventure to meet up with her near where she and her family were staying.

Cindy confessed that her family didn’t think her blogging friends were real. Not only was it fun to prove that notion wrong but it’s also pretty amazing to discover that our blogging friends are pretty much who you’d expect them to be based on their writing.

Jack is witty, Libby is passionate, Deb is whip-smart and charming, Betsy is clever and strong, and Cindy is authentic and inspiring. Seeing that depth in person makes me even more grateful for the realness of this lovely community!

(featured photo taken by Cindy Georgakas)

One Hundred and Still Going Strong

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“Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” – Thomas Edison

In the senior living community where my mom lives, there are several people over 100 years of age. My kids love hearing stories about them and meeting them in the hallway. After all, if you reach 100, you’ve probably learned a thing or two, right?

Let’s hope so because Vicki Atkinson and I are celebrating our 100th episode of the Sharing the Heart of the Matter podcast. I’m just so incredibly grateful that Vicki, my podcast partner and dear friend, was and continues to be willing to do a storytelling and author podcast with me. Despite the fact that we’ve never met, this has been such a rich collaboration in which I’ve learned SO MUCH from the ever insightful, engaging, and sunny, Dr. Vicki!

We’ve also learned a bit about podcasting over these two years. So we sit down to mark the moment and answer four questions:

  • What were our favorite stories?
  • Do we have a biggest a-ha moment?
  • What have we learned as hosts?
  • Goals for the Sharing the Heart of the Matter podcast in 2025?

Vicki shares that she actually went back and listened to the very first episode. She says that instead of the cringe-worthy moment she expected, it was worth listening to our goals of being authentic and vulnerable.

We also spend some time laughing about the technical difficulties we’ve encountered along the way. In spite of those, we’ve forged through and added features like captions and transcripts to make the podcast more accessible.

In this celebratory moment, we honor all the incredible and inspiring guests we’ve had on and applaud our wonderful listeners and subscribers. We couldn’t be more grateful for all of you who’ve accompanied us on this journey.

I’m confident you’ll love the scenic and beautiful places we explore as we share the power of storytelling and pause to celebrate before we move on to the next 100 episodes!

We know you’ll love it!

Please help us celebrate 100 episodes by subscribing on YouTube and Spotify!

Search (and subscribe!) for Sharing the Heart of the Matter on Apple, Amazon, Spotify or Pocket Casts OR Listen to it from your computer on Anchor: Episode 100: Celebrate with Us!

HoTM Episode 100 transcript

AND subscribe to our YouTube channel to see a video clip of each story: @SharingtheHeartoftheMatter.

Links for this Episode:

GRATITUDE for the Guests that have joined us on these 100 episodes – sometimes even more than once!

From the hosts:

Vicki’s book about resilience and love: Surviving Sue; Blog: https://victoriaponders.com/

My book about my beloved father: Finding My Father’s Faith;

(featured photo from Pexels)

The Fate Worse Than No

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“If you believe it will work out, you’ll see opportunities. If you believe it won’t, you will see obstacles.” – Wayne Dwyer

When my friend, Eric, was over for dinner last week, I asked him if he had room in his car to take his chairs home. In the pause as he considered it, Miss O jumped in and said, “Yeah, they were just dumped here.”

Eric surprisingly showed up with chairs unbidden on the morning of Thanksgiving of 2023. And while we used them around the table for that Thanksgiving and this past one, they haven’t been used otherwise.

I think Miss O was doing the thing we often do – saying one sentence too much when there’s a pause because we’re afraid the answer will be “no.” Call it pressing the point or making the case, often it’s trying to shift the answer in our favor. Sometimes it comes with an unnecessary punch.

Because “no” isn’t the worse thing we can hear. Sure, it means we aren’t getting our way for the moment. But consider all the missed opportunities if we didn’t ask at all. Things like dates you didn’t go on, the path you didn’t take, and the pitches you didn’t make.

And the chairs we stored for 420 days because I hadn’t asked my friend to take them. Fortunately, Eric did have room for chairs in his car that night. As we carried them to his car, he and I had a good laugh about the chairs that were “dumped.” Not the word I’d use because they came with good intent and thankfully left in the same spirit.  

(featured photo from Pexels)

A Fond Farewell

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“Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.” – Mark Twain

I’ve become entranced with a word lately: inkling.

Inkling according to Merriam-Webster is a slight knowledge or vague notion. It comes from Middle English yngkiling meaning “whisper or mention.”

When I think of the inklings I’ve gotten, they relate to the niggling feeling that something is off. I’ve had inklings about big events like when my business partner told me of my ex-husband’s infidelities and right before I was laid off. Kinda like a surprise party when everyone stops talking to you in advance.

And I get inklings about little things like when one of my kids is about to catch a cold. Something isn’t quite right about how they react or eat food and it sets off the radar.

For me, inklings are closely related to the internal God whispers, those insistent notions that seem Divinely inspired. On a recent morning when I meditated, I had the urgent sense that I needed to reach out to our dear blogging friend, Julia Preston.

Later that day, I discovered that she’d passed away the night before at the age of 85. She hadn’t blogged much after her cancer diagnosis but she’s been present in emails and comments in the last few months.

After I published one of my favorite posts about the words I become entranced with, My Love Affair with Words, Julia jokingly asked what word I associated with her. I had no hesitation before responding “luminescent.” Julia glowed with love and light for all. She faced her diagnosis with that same delightful curiosity about what comes next.

Her last blog post hinted about the light and love we all can (and should) tap into. Julia left us with the question in When We Gonna: “When are we gonna turn the world around with the power of our thoughts? When are we gonna create light instead of dark and love instead of fear?“

Julia was laid to rest yesterday. For anyone who has an inkling to do something in her honor, her favorite causes were St. Jude’s Children’s Research Hospital and the ASPCA.

RIP, dear Julia. Your light and love remains!

For more about Julia’s profound impact, please see Vicki Atkinson‘s beautiful reminiscence in Collective Gratitude: The Feast Before the Feast

And Julia’s most recent book is available on Amazon: Voices: Who’s In Charge of the Committee in My Head?

(featured photo from Pexels)