Tag: writing

The Forces That Shape Us

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I graduated from college by the time the human genome was mapped. But we still did a lot of interesting science lessons like mapping the results of dominant and recessive genes. I think it was 7th grade science where we learned how to predict traits like eye color for progeny of different pairings.

Neuroscientist David Eagleman provides another factor shaping who we are. He says that who we are is shaped by the five people we spend the most time with. Our brains actually change based on who we are spending the most time with and that includes the unsavory character at work if they make the top five.

So on this week’s Life of Try podcast I dig in to the five character types that influence who I am and what I’m trying. Sharing stories from climbing Mt. Rainier, mentors who cheer from the sidelines, and hiking with my kids to reveal the five people everyone needs:

The Yes’ers who turn crazy ideas into plans.
The Guides who share their notes.
The Counterpoint who gives you the gift of a pause.
The Foundation who shows up when things fall apart.
The Visionaries who remind you that you can do great things.

This week’s challenge: Name your five, thank one of them, and be that person for someone else. Because you were never meant to try alone.

Links for this episode:

Who’s In Your Corner: The Five People Who Shape Who You Are transcript

Related Episode

The Power of Saying Yes with Natasha Dillinger

Success isn’t always about finishing first. Sometimes the greatest victories belong to those who stay prepared, keep growing, and never stop trying.

(featured photo from Pexels)

If my work has encouraged, inspired, or helped you try something new, consider supporting it with a small “cup of coffee” donation. Your support helps me keep creating conversations, stories, and resources that cheer people on as they do brave, meaningful work.

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram wynneleon

I Believe You

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A few weeks ago as I was making dinner, feeding the animals, and trying to fit in one more work task, my eleven-year-old daughter said something surprising. “I don’t have any friends.” As the person who sits next to where her Apple Watch charges, I wanted to counter with how often her watch buzzes with texts and phone calls.

But parenting has taught me the power of believing people when confess how they feel.

It started with my kids when they were toddlers and told me they had an owie. I believed them. Seeing the curative effect, I learned to extend it to accepting that when someone says they are lonely, scared, happy, hurting, or whatever else they may be feeling, that it’s true.

It doesn’t have to be objectively true or even true over time. But taking what they say at face value for that moment has turned out to be a good place to start.

When I can do it, that is. It’s often inconvenient to believe people when they tell you how they feel. The other night in order to really listen to my daughter it meant having to pause dinner prep, close my laptop, and tell the pets to wait.

In other cases, it sometimes means having to change plans. Or even more disruptive, adjusting a perception of their lives in relation to mine. I have to stop being a fixer because some of the utility of talking people out of their feelings is so that you don’t have to fix it.

On the flip side, I’ve seen the power of being believed. It removes any defensiveness because there is no need to prove the statement. And it often shares the weight of the load. It eases the path because the person who is believed doesn’t have to add feeling unheard to their burden.

Simply for me, it’s moved me from listening with my head to relating with my heart. It opens moments of connection.

Which was the case with my daughter. When I asked her to tell me more about her friends, we figured out that sense showed up because the friend who she was eating second lunch with had a schedule change and was moved to first lunch. My daughter was feeling the loss.

Feelings are sometimes hard to nail down. Finding people who believe you shouldn’t be so hard.

(featured photo from Pexels)

If my work has encouraged, inspired, or helped you try something new, consider supporting it with a small “cup of coffee” donation. Your support helps me keep creating conversations, stories, and resources that cheer people on as they do brave, meaningful work.

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram wynneleon

What Comes After the Try

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The World Series, the New York Marathon, the US elections – we’ve had some really big finish lines in the past couple of weeks. What’s interesting is that I don’t think we talk enough about the letdown that comes after finish lines. With the things that we try, there is often a post-event exhale that is not always easy.

After months of preparing a podcast episode with Melissa Arnot Reid, I expected relief. Instead, I felt exhausted and a little lost. I explore that post-achievement low with this Life of Try episode about goal setting, expectations, personal growth, and making room for rest after a meaningful effort.

Drawing on reflections from therapist Niro Feliciano and research psychologist Dr. Richard Brown, I talk about loosening your grip on outcomes, enjoying the process, and finding contentment in everyday moments—from a cup of tea to a Cheetos puzzle.

In this episode, I explore:

  • The arrival fallacy: expecting a goal to bring lasting satisfaction
  • Feeling proud and tired at the same time
  • Finding small joys beyond achievement
  • Moving toward your next try with kindness rather than pressure

If you’ve finished a project, returned from a long-awaited trip, or reached a milestone and wondered, “Now what?”—this conversation is for you. Please subscribe to The Life of Try, leave a comment with your biggest takeaway, and share this episode with someone who needs the reminder to let the effort count. And let the rest count, too.

Links for this episode:

The Arrival Fallacy: Finding Your Way After a Big Goal transcript

Why Do I Still Feel Like a Failure After Reaching a Goal? A Therapist Explains by Niro Feliciano

Post-Achievement Depression: Overcoming the Slump | Psychology Today by Richard Brown

Related Episode

Growth Mindset, Habit Formation, and the Power of Rest

Success isn’t always about finishing first. Sometimes the greatest victories belong to those who stay prepared, keep growing, and never stop trying.

(featured photo from Pexels)

If my work has encouraged, inspired, or helped you try something new, consider supporting it with a small “cup of coffee” donation. Your support helps me keep creating conversations, stories, and resources that cheer people on as they do brave, meaningful work.

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram wynneleon

Risking Too Much and Risking Too Little

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There was a delightfully hopeful young man loaded with gifts outside the middle school last week. He had music playing, a half dozen red roses, a stuffed animal and some candy.  I watched him out of the corner of my eye while I leaned against a pole in the weak fall sunshine and waited for my daughter to come out of the school.

The 850 students of the students seemed to exit in big waves. The first rush of kids eager to be done with school for the day piled out. Then the second, third waves hit and my daughter came out in the fourth. I pointed out the young man with flowers and she said, “He’s waiting to ask someone out.”

But still, the young man stood there, his intended recipient had not yet arrived. My daughter and I went in to check on something in the office. When we came out, he was still there waiting. Other students seemed to be sticking around just to see what happened.

We stuck around a little longer. After about six or seven waves of students piling out, the flow trickled down to just a couple here and there. My heart was beating loudly as I imagined the almost unbearable weight of suspense juxtaposed with his careful planning but the music was still playing and his expression was calm.

My daughter and I finally turned toward the parking lot to leave. We’d gotten about fifty feet when a huge cheer exploded in the crowd – she’d finally arrived. And she must have said, “yes!”

I’ve been pondering a quote that I recently heard a quote from filmmaker Jimmy Chin (director of films like Free Solo, Meru and Everest: The Other Side which was just released).

There are two great risks in life – risking too much and risking too little. They both have extraordinary costs. – Jimmy Chin

It strikes me that those risks come in all shapes and sizes. Asking someone out in middle school definitely qualifies. And from the smiles we saw on the young couple’s faces as we drove past them in the car, I’m so glad this one paid off.

Why No Summit Can Prove Your Worth

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I firmly believe in the adage, “Wherever you go, there you are.” Still, it’s comforting to read a great book that reminds me I’m not alone—even those who reach great heights struggle within.

As is the case with renowned mountain climber, Melissa Arnot Reid. Melissa has summitted Everest six times – including once in which she became the first American woman to summit without the use of supplemental oxygen and survive the descent.

Impressive, right? But Melissa has written an incredibly touching and vulnerable memoir that reminds us that there is no accomplishment that can prove we are worthy if we don’t already believe it ourselves. Her story is so powerful precisely because she has done extraordinary things and still had to come to terms with her own stuff. Just like with Cheryl Strayed’s book, Wild, Melissa’s journey reminds us that sometimes we have to walk a lot of miles just to get to know ourselves.

In this episode of The Life of Try, I was lucky enough to get to talk with mountaineer, guide, and author Melissa Arnot Reid about her memoir, Enough. We explore how writing can bring hidden parts of our lives into the light, why success can disguise inner struggle, and what it means to move from seeking validation to living by our values. Our honest conversation also covers vulnerability, self-compassion, women in male-dominated spaces, nurturing leadership, mentorship, grief, parenting, and the courage to keep showing up when life is hard.

Melissa shares her vision of “mountain goddess” leadership—combining ambition and firmness with tenderness, curiosity, and room for imperfection. She also reveals how the mountains have changed for her: no longer a place to prove herself, but a place to learn, explore, and discover what was already there.

In this conversation:

  • Why we cannot achieve our way into belonging
  • How vulnerability and imperfection strengthen leadership
  • “Mountain goddess” mentorship in male-dominated spaces
  • The power of showing up when circumstances are difficult
  • Moving from validation-seeking to values-driven curiosity
  • Why a summit may reveal us rather than change us

One other note about the power of showing up that we talk about in this episode. After the death of her friend, Chhewang Nima in an avalanche in 2010, Melissa co-founded The Juniper Fund. The fund supports Himalayan mountain workers, their families and communities. As this episode goes live, Melissa in is Nepal doing Juniper Fund work of showing up in grief and support for families that have lost someone while trying to improve the safety margins of Nepali climbers. Link to The Juniper Fund site is below.

If this conversation resonates with you, please subscribe to The Life of Try, leave a comment with your biggest takeaway, and share this episode with someone who needs the reminder that they are already enough.

Links for this episode:

Melissa Arnot Reid on Enough: Why No Summit Can Prove Your Worth transcript

Melissa Arnot Reid’s website

The Juniper Fund: Supporting Himalayan Mountain Workers, their families and communities website

Buy Enough: Climbing Toward a True Self on Mount Everest on Barnes & Noble, Bookshop or Amazon

Related Episode

When You Know You’re Not Going to Make It

Success isn’t always about finishing first. Sometimes the greatest victories belong to those who stay prepared, keep growing, and never stop trying.

(featured photo from Pexels)

If my work has encouraged, inspired, or helped you try something new, consider supporting it with a small “cup of coffee” donation. Your support helps me keep creating conversations, stories, and resources that cheer people on as they do brave, meaningful work.

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram wynneleon

Solving Life’s Problems

Posted in life lessonsTagged , , , , , , , , , , 51 Comments

I keep learning the same lessons again and again. Isn’t it funny when you finally solve something and realize you are a frequent flyer with that particular issue?

My son hasn’t been liking 2nd grade. I couldn’t really figure out why. My guesses were because there are shorter recesses, he has a teacher that’s new to the school, or just basic learning style. So I’ve been trying all sorts of things: biking with him to school, talking with the teacher to see how I can help, organizing lots of playdates and fun after school activities to make life in general better, saying I’d pay him at the end of the quarter if he tries hard.

Nothing I was doing seemed to be making a difference. I finally said to him, “I will never give up trying to make this better for you. But you’ve got to keep trying too.” I thought throwing in the towel on education at seven-years-old was too young.

Finally, because math seemed to be what he dreaded the most, I found a math tutoring place. I kinda winced when I told him we were going there – it didn’t seem like more school after school when he doesn’t like school would go over well.

But he loved it. After our first session there, it was like a weight lifted off his shoulders. After his second time, he asked when he could go back. He was disappointed that it was five days til his next session, so I scheduled him an extra one on the weekend.

And the lesson? Lean-in. When an issue arises, it can be an invitation to do more, not less.

P.S. I have a fantastic Life of Try podcast interview with the phenomenal climber Melissa Arnot Reid that will drop on Wednesday (10/28). Melissa’s memoir, Enough, Climbing Toward a True Self on Mt. Everest is a powerful example of leaning-in to solve what isn’t working on the inside — even when you are meeting with great success on the outside. Please subscribe so you don’t miss it!

(featured photo from Pexels)

If my work has encouraged, inspired, or helped you try something new, consider supporting it with a small “cup of coffee” donation. Your support helps me keep creating conversations, stories, and resources that cheer people on as they do brave, meaningful work.

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram wynneleon

Please check out the The Life of Try podcast Where trying becomes the spark for personal growth, discovery, and re-invention!

Unleash Your Humanity

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I’ve played around with a lot of taglines for my podcast, The Life of Try. But my guest for this podcast, human rights lawyer and UN Humanitarian, Yasmine Sherif said something in this week’s episode that I might have to borrow for a mission statement. She said:

“But if we make a conscious choice to live
with joy and curiosity and creativity and
Wanting to learn, wanting to search, wanting to find why I am here, my purpose,
and to do it with love and humanity and excitement,
we can.

“And we can then better also manage challenges when they come our way.
So instead of being broken by the challenges,
we take them and we quickly recognize an opportunity.
Or eventually recognize it. It depends what it is. Sometimes it takes longer.”

In this episode, we talk about Yasmine’s book, Unleash Your Humanity. It is both a memoir and a manifesto so we learn about Yasmine’s journey from a childhood shaped by two cultures to humanitarian work on the front lines of conflict. In our conversation, she shares how faith, persistence, intuition, and a deep commitment to service helped her choose humanity over fear—even when lives were at stake.

We explore:

  • Why trust can become the foundation of courage
  • How adversity can lead to personal awakening
  • What authentic, purpose-driven leadership looks like
  • Why courage grows through repeated choices
  • How serving one person can contribute to collective change

One idea stayed with me: our humanity is not a weakness. It is one of our greatest sources of strength.

If you’re navigating uncertainty, stepping beyond your comfort zone, or asking how your work can serve something larger, I hope this conversation reminds you that showing up with heart and purpose matters.

Links for this episode:

Unleash Your Humanity: Courage, Resilience & Purpose with Yasmine Sherif transcript

Yasmine Sherif’s website

Unleash Your Humanity: Where Personal Awakening Becomes Collective Change website

Buy Unleash Your Humanity on Barnes & Noble, Bookshop and Amazon

Related Episode

Way Will Open: How To Trust Life’s Timing

Success isn’t always about finishing first. Sometimes the greatest victories belong to those who stay prepared, keep growing, and never stop trying.

(featured photo from Pexels)

If my work has encouraged, inspired, or helped you try something new, consider supporting it with a small “cup of coffee” donation. Your support helps me keep creating conversations, stories, and resources that cheer people on as they do brave, meaningful work.

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram wynneleon

Good Leadership in Action

Posted in inspirationTagged , , , , , , , 57 Comments

Recently I had a front row seat to what good leadership looks like. My 11-year-old-daughter, Miss O, is a new 6th grader at a middle school with 850 kids total for 6th, 7th and 8th grades.

She came home one day and told me that she was late to her 5th period science class. Apparently, as she leaves lunch to walk to class, she often encounters a girl who has spilled out a game to play with. Miss O stops to help her put it back in the box.

But on the day in question, the girl had spilled out 4 games so there were hundreds of cards that needed to be sorted out. Miss O stopped to help. Then the girl’s educational assistant came by, asked if Miss O would continue while she and the girl went off to class.

Right as Miss O was finishing, her 5th period class walked by on the way to picture day so Miss O joined the line.

When the school notified me that Miss O was absent from 5th period, I told them the story and clarified she was late but not absent. The attendance person wrote me back to let me know it was all taken care of.

End of story, right? The system worked as it should and all was fine.

Except Miss O came home from school the next day with the kicker. When she stopped again to help the girl at the end of lunch, the principal showed up to thank her, gave her some candy and a school pin, and walked her to 5th period so she wouldn’t be marked late.

Amazing. In a school with 850 students, the attendance person must have mentioned to the principal the story of this one girl stopping to help someone. And then he made a note of it to stop and recognize her. She had chosen to do this all on her own so it wasn’t about being noticed. But what the principal did boosted her natural inclination to help enormously. It’s one thank you that is likely to have a ripple effect through her years.

I was recently reading, Unleash Your Humanity by Yasmine Sherif. Yasmine is a human-rights lawyer that has worked within the UN system for more than 30 years. She writes about what she’s learned about leadership,

“I have learned that humanity rises less through obligation and more through willingness. Leadership is not about becoming perfect. It is about being present and showing up with awareness. Humanity can rise, not from obligation but from desire and joy. We do not need to search the light, we can be the light—not flawless, but steadfast.” – Yasmine Sherif in Unleash Your Humanity

Like the principal at my daughter’s school, showing up with awareness matters. It spreads something viral – inspiration and kindness.

P.S. I was lucky enough to interview Yasmine Sherif about her book and what she’s learned about how we can all be the light. The Life of Try podcast with Yasmine will release on Wednesday, 10/21 and Yasmine’s passion and energy are infectious! Please subscribe so you don’t miss it!

P.P.S. After hearing about what the principal had done, I emailed the superintendent of Seattle Public Schools to tell him the story. He responded about 10 minutes later and copied the principal, the principal’s boss, and the HR department. The ripples of goodness keep echoing on.

(featured photo from Pexels)

If my work has encouraged, inspired, or helped you try something new, consider supporting it with a small “cup of coffee” donation. Your support helps me keep creating conversations, stories, and resources that cheer people on as they do brave, meaningful work.

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram wynneleon

Please check out the The Life of Try podcast Where trying becomes the spark for personal growth, discovery, and re-invention!

Trying Vs. Hustling

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When my son was an infant, he was a good eater and he gained weight quickly. One day, Deirdre, my meditation teacher, overhead one of my family members calling him “chunky.” She objected saying that words matter – even if it was said affectionately long before he was verbal.

My son who is now seven-years-old recently won the “Hustle award” at baseball camp. It reminded me of Deirdre’s comment that words matter. What separates healthy ambition from hustling for your worth?

In this episode of the Life of Try podcast, I explore how effort driven by curiosity and courage feels different from striving for approval. Through insights inspired by Brené Brown and Dr. Vicki Atkinson, I dig in to how to recognize fear-driven productivity, step away from the pressure to prove ourselves, and choose a more wholehearted path to personal growth.

Key Takeaways:

  • How can we recognize when achievement is tied to self-worth?
  • What distinguishes purposeful effort from approval-seeking
  • How can we replace perfectionism with curiosity and courage
  • Use two simple questions (from the incredible Vicki Atkinson) to reconnect with gratitude and meaning

Links for this episode:

Stop Hustling For Your Worth: A Better Way to Grow transcript

In You Must Go: Harnessing the Force of Owning Our Stories by Brene Brown

Victoria Ponders – Dr. Vicki Atkinson’s blog

Related Episode

How to Finally Write the Book You’ve Been Dreaming About with Vicki Atkinson

Success isn’t always about finishing first. Sometimes the greatest victories belong to those who stay prepared, keep growing, and never stop trying.

(featured photo from Pexels)

If my work has encouraged, inspired, or helped you try something new, consider supporting it with a small “cup of coffee” donation. Your support helps me keep creating conversations, stories, and resources that cheer people on as they do brave, meaningful work.

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram wynneleon

The Need for Repacking

Posted in life lessonsTagged , , , , , , , , , 56 Comments

The first time I shouldered a full backpacking load, I was 20 years old at the base of a hiking trail in the Ecuadorian Andes. I didn’t have the strength to lift my pack, rotate it around to my back, and then hoist my shoulders through. So the leader of the trip suggested I balance my pack on the ground and then sit down next to it and snake my arms into the straps.

So I did that – and promptly tipped sideways.

I mention this because that’s how I feel this fall. I keep tipping over when I try to carry my load. The balance is off and I can’t quite get grounded enough underneath it to shoulder it with any steadiness.

Both my kids need help with school. My 11-year-old daughter is doing fine at middle school but it’s 6 periods and a lot of additional activities.  Keeping track of what goes where and what is due requires some organizational skills that she’s still developing.

And my 7-year-old son isn’t liking 2nd grade. His teacher is new to the school and the district has pared back on recess and amped up math time. It’s a rhythm that he’s finding challenging.

So I bike with him to school to help him get some exercise in before the day starts. Then I bike home and get my daughter off. By that time I’ve spent almost 2 hours getting my kids ready for school. And I’m in transition at work as well so I finding it hard to settle in myself.

Bumpy. That’s how it feels.

I mention the backpack because it’s the way I know for carrying loads. The lesson that I’ve learned repeatedly is that when I am having trouble carrying things, it’s usually because I’ve added them on without repacking. You can’t just stuff new items in the outer pockets, carry extra items in your hands, or clip them onto the top. If you do, they’ll hit you in the face every time you lean over – or you’ll drop them.

When I’ve resisted repacking my pack, it’s usually because I’m scared the group is going to go without me or that I’ll lose my momentum. But I’ve learned it’s not sustainable to carry an unexamined load.

Pull everything out

Give back what’s not yours to carry

Discard the baggage that you no longer need to haul with you

Repack only what is essential

Then you can shoulder a load that you can carry. My apologies if I miss anything while I’m repacking. I hope to be back to my balanced way forward soon!

(photos is of Miss O carrying a backpack at age 4)

If my work has encouraged, inspired, or helped you try something new, consider supporting it with a small “cup of coffee” donation. Your support helps me keep creating conversations, stories, and resources that cheer people on as they do brave, meaningful work.

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram wynneleon

Please check out the The Life of Try podcast Where trying becomes the spark for personal growth, discovery, and re-invention!