Tag: motivation

Inspiration and More

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“Learn the rules like a pro so you can break them like an artist.” – Pablo Picasso

The other day I was with my five-year-old son, Mr. D, in a room of storage lockers. He was checking everything out and said, “Look at that wonder.”

I followed his gaze to a padlock that had a piece of tape with a question mark on it. My interpretation was that the owner of the lock was unknown. But I liked Mr. D’s better – just look at that wonder.

I get so much inspiration from my kids. They see things with new eyes and help me to peel away my assumptions that cover over so many things.

But there are other ways to break out of that mold and we talk about some in the latest episode of the Sharing the Heart of Matter podcast. Vicki Atkinson and I are with author, graphic designer, and blogger, Dave Williams.

I love reading something that gets my creative juices going. But even better in the community of podcasting and blogging is catching a ride on everyone else’s enthusiasm!

In this episode, Dave Williams, tells us about the inspiration he gleaned from reading Felicia Day’s book, “Embrace Your Weird.”

Felicia’s book is more than a read, it’s an experience of exercises to break us out of our creative ruts. Dave shares his take on what inhibits our natural flow and some of the things that inspire him.

This is a great episode with the incredibly talented and creative Dave Williams. We get to draft off of his inspiration, Felicia Day’s book, and the flow of creative sparks.

I’m certain you’ll enjoy the scenic and inspiring places we go when we share the power of story.

We know you’ll love it!

Search (and subscribe!) for Sharing the Heart of the Matter on Apple, Amazon, Spotify or Pocket Casts OR Listen to it from your computer on Anchor: Episode 82: “Embrace Your Weird” with Author Dave Williams

AND subscribe to our YouTube channel to see a video clip of each story: @SharingtheHeartoftheMatter.

Transcript for this episode: Episode 82 transcript

Links for this Episode:

Dave Williams – writings and drawings (wordpress.com)

‘Bubba Ho-Tep’ and feeling more okay about creating weirdness – Dave Williams (wordpress.com)

Dave’s review of Felicia Day’s book can be found here.

“Embrace Your Weird” by Felicia Day – linked here.

(featured photo from Pexels)

My Favorite Quotes about Writing

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“I love quotations because it is a joy to find thoughts one might have, beautifully expressed with much authority by someone recognized wiser than oneself. ” – Marlene Deitrich

This post was originally published on 8/30/2023. Heads up – you may have already seen this.

I think it’s safe to say that writing is the subject that I’ve studied longest. Sure, it started with just grasping the pencil with some dexterity and has developed through school essays, technical writing, and now to developing a personal angle with memoir writing, and blogging. But whatever the genre, it feels like an incredibly rich and vast subject of study.

So here are five of my favorite quotes about writing.

“A professional writer is an amateur who didn’t quit.” – Richard Bach

“Write what you need to read.” – Adage

“The discipline of creation, be it to paint, compose, write, is an effort towards wholeness.” – Madeleine L’Engle

“I didn’t have time to write you a short letter, so I wrote you a long one.” – Mark Twain

“If you don’t have time to read, you don’t have time (or the tools) to write. Simple as that.” – Stephen King

What are your favorite quotes for writing inspiration?

The horrible, terrible, no-good, very bad day

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“Things falling apart is a kind of testing and also a kind of healing. We think that the point is to pass the test or to overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy.” – Pema Chӧdrӧn

On this past Saturday, we had a horrible, terrible, no-good, very bad day.*

Cooper the dog, had some potty accidents that we discovered. A couple that I found and cleaned up first thing in the morning, and a couple that Miss O unceremoniously stumbled upon. Ewww. Apparently, Cooper had GI issues after his surgery to remove the grass from his ear on Thursday.

We found some bugs in our pancake mix.

Then nine-year-old Miss O saw that the vines in Rusty, the crested gecko’s enclosure had fallen down. On closer inspection, we’d been misting too much and the whole enclosure was a swamp. So, instead of our to-do list chores, we spent all morning rehabilitating Rusty’s setup.

[Side note: We called my niece to get some advice. She’s the one who gave us Rusty. Miss O told her that we’d gotten Rusty out of the enclosure by saying, “We executed Rusty.” We quickly clarified that we’d evacuated, not executed, Rusty.]

At a kid’s birthday party, five-year-old Mr. D got hit in the head by a water balloon thrown by an 11-year-old boy who had been spitting in the ballons before hurling them.

Our tap water turned brown.

It was literally one thing after another. Some things caused by us, like Rusty’s enclosure. Some things that were random like the water turning brown. Some things caused by other humans like the water balloon.

There is probably nothing that peeves me more than life messing with my efficiency. I was not in a great mood, but I’ve learned from experience that rough days call for leadership, even when I don’t feel like it.

At one point in the day, Miss O exasperatedly said, “This is awful. I don’t know what to do!”

So, we talked about my dad’s approach to just find the next right thing to do. And we took comfort that what we did have to respond to “life” with was each other. We were doing pretty good job of sticking together.

Then as the kids were getting ready for bed, a huge lightning storm came in. Seattle very rarely gets thunderstorms so this was a rare and incredible show. After they brushed their teeth, we snuggled in my bed with all the curtains open and watched the storm.

It was fitting. On a day that seemed extra “life-y,” to let the storm and rain exhaust itself and pass on through. In that way, we weathered the storm.

(featured photo from Pexels)

*Title is a riff on the children’s book, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by Judy Viorst

Pursuing Goals Passionately

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“The world needs dreamers and the world needs doers. But above all, the world needs dreamers who do.” – unknown-

When I was in third grade, Olivia Newton-John released her Totally Hot album. I had never wanted anything so much in my whole life (all eight years of it). My 25 cent allowance and lack of savings made a $7 album seem way out of reach.

The way I remember it, my mom thought it was a silly thing to spend money on and informed me I didn’t have enough money. But I wouldn’t be deterred. Eventually, I begged, borrowed, and did extra chores until I bought Totally Hot as my first album (and yes, it was a true vinyl album.)

I thought of this story when listening to the Ten Percent Happier podcast, The Science of Manifestation with Dr. James R. Doty. He has six steps for manifestation:

  1. Reclaim your power to focus
  2. Clarify what you truly want
  3. Remove the obstacles in your mind
  4. Embed the intention into our subconscious
  5. Pursue your goal passionately
  6. Let go of attachment to any particular outcome

[Side note: Dr. Doty also mentions the empty satisfaction of materialism, much preferring community and service for true happiness. For the record, I used Totally Hot to create dance routines with my friends. :)]

The Ten Percent Happier podcast also made me of blogging friend and author, Mark Petruska, who is a master manifester. So Vicki Atkinson and I talked with Mark in the latest episode of our podcast.

Mark tells us a great story about how he willed a campsite into existence. Even better, it was for his wife’s birthday! And it was in one of my favorite places – Mt. Rainier National Park!

We love Mark’s incredible mix of optimism, focus, and passion. So Vicki and I get him to elaborate how he harnesses the power of manifestation.

Building on the published work of Stanford professor, Dr. James Doty, we talk about the steps Dr. Doty suggests for manifesting outcomes in our lives. This isn’t just wishing for something, it is digging one’s heels in and passionately pursuing an outcome.

Which Mark illustrates beautifully with a great story about manifesting a refund.

This is a great episode about the power of setting our intentions, not listening to naysayers, and manifesting the things that are important. It’s inspirational, powerful, and fun!

I’m certain you’ll enjoy the scenic and beautiful places we go when we share the power of story.

We know you’ll love it!

Search (and subscribe!) for Sharing the Heart of the Matter on Apple, Amazon, Spotify or Pocket Casts OR Listen to it from your computer on Anchor: Episode 80: Mastering Manifestation with Mark Petruska

AND subscribe to our YouTube channel to see a video clip of each story: @SharingtheHeartoftheMatter.

Transcript for this episode: HoTM episode 80 transcript

Links for this Episode:

Mark My Words – MARK PETRUSKA | WRITER

Ohanapecosh, By Gosh! – Mark My Words (markpetruska.com)

(featured image from Pexels)

Riding the Rhythm Into the Comfort Zone

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“Each one must learn the highest wisdom. It cannot be taught in words.” – Smowhala Wanapum

We’ve just returned from two week vacation on the beach. It was an incredible privilege to be able to take that time. It was born of a feeling that Mr. D needed a break between his 52-weeks-a-year preschool and starting Kindergarten. But it turned out to be something we all needed.

We had lots of friends join us. My friend, Eric, was with us a good deal of the two weeks. Also, my oldest friend, Katie, my meditation teacher, Deirdre, my mom, and one of Miss O’s friends came with her mom for part of the time.

But we also spent a number of days just the three of us. For anyone not in this phase of life with young children, it’s a tricky thing to present children with a whole lot of unstructured time. Ah, who am I kidding? It seems to be problematic for most every age.

For us, it started out with some rough moments. Mr. D lost it a few days in a row. The things that set it off were so innocuous. Like the time he didn’t want Miss O and her friend to go out in the dinghy after dinner even though he was invited and included. It had to be something else bugging him.

And then we found the rhythm. Activity, break, activity, food, activity, break, food, activity, bed. For example, wake up, walk on the beach, and then take a break; go swimming and then break for lunch; then pickleball; take a break; dinner and paddleboarding, then have some downtime watching shows and go to bed.

Here’s the lesson I derived for myself – when life feels new or unsettling, find the rhythm. Often the rhythm gets us through even when we are outside of our comfort zone.

It’s like every new hike or mountain I’ve undertaken. I feel the anxiety of not knowing where I’m going. And then I shoulder my pack and start walking. Soon enough, I will find or experience the answers. I just need to rely on the rhythm of my pace until I get there.

Resilience and The Right Team

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“Children, marriages, and flower gardens reflect the kind of care that they get.” – H. Jackson Brown Jr.

I know it’s bad form to brag about your kids. So I’ll ask for your apology in advance. I want to set the expectations appropriately, and then still do exactly what I want to do. Because I was so inspired by my four-year-old that it seems worth passing along.

Two days ago, I saw my son, Mr. D, pull off an incredible feat of resilience. He went to an Aikido class expecting that he could test for his yellow belt. Not only did he expect this, but he’d told his teachers at school, and we’d gotten my mom to come to the class to watch. Plus his favorite person on the planet, his darling older sister, would be there.

But when he did his practice test, he screwed up the forward rolls. The Sensei is a very good teacher and won’t let anyone take the test until they’ve got it down. So, she let him know before his class started that he wouldn’t be able to test that day.

He lined up for class with his bottom lip quivering and he kept glancing at me to commiserate his disappointment. The crestfallen look on his face was enough that I felt like crying myself. But about halfway through the 50-minute class, he took a deep breath in, squared his shoulders, and visibly moved on from the disappointment.

By the end of class, he was fully participating and laughing. When we went home, he kept practicing the move he messed up. He was still only landing on the correct foot about fifty percent of the time.

Then yesterday morning, he popped up out of bed and wanted to show me his rolls. He thought hard about it, and nailed it. After about a half dozen correct ones, he announced he was ready to test. When we went to Aikido class yesterday afternoon, he stepped up and nailed the test.

Expectation, disappointment, then coming back to earn it – kids do these things in such quick succession that they make it look easy. It makes me wonder if as grown-ups we remember these are part of a cycle. We just have to keep rolling to get through it.

One other thing strikes me. Kids have a whole network of people cheering them on. Teachers, coaches, parents, grandparents, and often even random bystanders will jump in to tell them they’re doing great.

Which makes me wonder if adults have the same. Are we cultivating the friends, partners, colleagues, and mentors that help us continue to be resilient? Are we being those people for others? It might make all the difference.

Using It All Up

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“When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say, I used everything you gave me.” – Erma Bombeck

My dad had a motto, especially in his retirement years. “I just want to be useful.” And as a retired pastor, that translated to serving on boards, guest preaching, teaching classes, and family stuff like helping me with my house and yard on Saturdays.

And he was very useful. But his usefulness required a lot of flexibility on my mom’s part.

A month or so ago, my 85-year-old mom asked, “Did you see Eleanor Coppola’s obituary in the paper?”

I hadn’t, so we found it and she read me this part, “ ‘There is part of me that has been waiting for Francis to leave me, or die, so that I can get my life the way I want it,’ Eleanor wrote. ‘I wonder if I have the guts to get it the way I want with him in it.’ “

I have a theory – that a lot of women don’t use up all their talent as the quote for this post by Erma Bombeck so beautifully says. That isn’t to say that it doesn’t apply to men, too.

But when it comes to women, it seems that after a lifetime of being flexible for others (relationships, kids, pets), women don’t often get ASKED in the same way that men do. So then it becomes a doubly-hard question about creating life the way as envisioned because it involves crafting the persona, network, and possibly upsetting the status quo at home.

In the case of Eleanor Coppola, it turns out that she died at age 87 before Francis. But she directed her first feature film at age 80. I hope that means she was able to get life the way she wanted it with him in it. In fact, one more quote from her obituary makes me think he was nudging her along:

“ ‘One morning at the breakfast table my husband said, “Well, you should direct it.” I was totally startled,’ Eleanor told The AP. ‘But I said, “Well, I never wrote a script before, and I’ve never directed, why not?” I was kind of saying “why not” to everything.”

As we tune in the deep whisper urging us to be useful and share all our talents with the world, I think we should remember to ask, “Why not?“

(featured photo from Pexels)

The Great Connectors

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“The angel seeing us is watching through each other’s eyes.” – Rickie Lee Jones

Isn’t it interesting when others know us well enough that they have great recommendations of who we should meet? In this case, I’m thinking of author, blogger, and retired teacher, Pete Springer and his uncanny ability to suggest connections.

It’s like being a matchmaker of writers, thinkers, and talkers.

So, in this week’s episode of our podcast, Vicki and I talk with Melanie McGauran, someone Pete fixed us up with. Melanie is a former newspaper reporter and has a beautiful blog, Leavingthedooropen.com.

Melanie tells the story of her friend, doctor and educator, Lissa McKinley. As Lissa goes through her own journey of cancer, it informs her abilities as a doctor, teacher, and humanist.

Melanie tells us of her long friendship with Lissa, starting in all-girls preparatory school, and how she drew inspiration from Lissa both in life and in death.

We talk about how writing helps touch others long after we’re gone, especially when we go through similar experiences.

Melanie tells us about how Lissa’s joy and gratitude rippled out — even more so now that she has shared it with us.

We also get to hear about Melanie’s inspiration as a writer and newspaper reporter, starting with the legacy of her grandparents who were well-known artists.

This is a great episode with a fabulous writer about gratitude, empathy, and connecting with others. Through words, actions, and sometimes even tattoos.

[We had some technical difficulties so you don’t see Vicki in this YouTube clip but you will hear her in the full podcast episode.]

So I know you’ll enjoy the scenic and beautiful places we go when we share the power of story.

We know you’ll love it!

Search (and subscribe!) for Sharing the Heart of the Matter on Apple, Amazon, Spotify or Pocket Casts.

And subscribe to our YouTube channel to see a video clip of each story: @SharingtheHeartoftheMatter.

Links for this Episode:

Podcast Friday! Episode 74: Remembering Friends with Melanie McGauran

Melanie’s Blog: Leavingthedooropen.com – Real Storytelling

Saving Lissa – Leavingthedooropen.com by Melanie McGauran – the source post for this episode

A New Me – Leavingthedooropen.com  by Melanie McGauran – a post about getting her tattoo

Vicki’s personal blog: Victoria Ponders

Vicki’s recently released book: Surviving Sue

Wynne’s book about her beloved father: Finding My Father’s Faith

Planning: The Vacation Edition

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“Plans are useless, but planning is invaluable.” – Winston Churchill

Miss O has been trying to predict the things she’ll tell her kids she didn’t have when she was young.

After watching a video and wishing she could smell what the person was holding up to the screen, eight-year-old Miss O said, “Someday I’ll be telling my kids that back in the day, we couldn’t smell our videos.”

Hey, it’s as good as anything I could come up with. In fact, I’m a terrible prognosticator. But I’m pretty good at figuring out a plan for things as they pop up.

Which made the podcast conversation Vicki and I had with blogger, writer, and planner, Brian Hannon, (Writing from the Heart with Brian) even more fun. Brian told us about how he plans family trips. He comes up with solid options and then his fellow travelers enthusiastically respond.

Well, that’s the idea at least. So, we talked about what it actually looks like to be a planner who is coaxing everyone along.

Brian brought forward the beautiful sense of calm that comes with having something on the horizon to look forward to. And we talked about how to blend planning and spontaneity.

This is a great podcast episode for the beginning of summer. Brian’s fantastic story-telling sparks our juices for how to enjoy our planned and unplanned vacations!

So I know you’ll enjoy the scenic and beautiful places we go when we share the power of story.

Here’s a sneak peek – you’ll love it! But don’t lean in – our videos don’t have any smell…yet!

Search (and subscribe!) for Sharing the Heart of the Matter on Apple, Amazon, Spotify or Pocket Casts OR Listen to it from your computer on Anchor Episode 73: Planning It Out with Brian Hannon

Or subscribe to our YouTube channel to see a video clip of each story: @SharingtheHeartoftheMatter.

Links for this Episode:

Episode 73: Planning It Out with Brian Hannon on Anchor

Two Kinds of People by Brian Hannon

Brian’s blog: Writing from the Heart with Brian

Vicki’s personal blog: Victoria Ponders

Vicki’s recently released book: Surviving Sue

Wynne’s book about her beloved father: Finding My Father’s Faith

Other podcast episodes featuring Brian Hannon:

Episode 58: Creative Heart with Brian Hannon

Episode 44: Hot Tips for Writing About Family with Brian Hannon

Episode 34: How to Write Family Narratives with Brian Hannon

Episode 17: Building a Base with Brian Hannon

Lost and Found People

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“The good road and the road of difficulties, you have made me cross; and where they cross, the place is holy.” – Black Elk, Oglala Lakota Medicine Man

The other day I was sitting at the kitchen table with Miss O. One of the 20-somethings in our lives had just shared with us that she was pregnant and Miss O was so excited.

She asked, “Mommy, how did you tell Nana [my mom] that you were pregnant with me?”

I replied, “Well, it wasn’t that much of a surprise with IVF because she knew I went in to have an embryo implanted. Then 10 days later they did a blood test to determine whether I was pregnant. So I think I called her or I texted her.”

Then she surprisingly asked, “And she was happy?”

Trying to figure out the phrasing, I raised an eyebrow and replied. “She was thrilled.”

And then Miss O revealed why she’d asked like that, “Even though Bumpa [my dad] had just died?”

Oohhh, she was putting together the news with the story that she already knew which is that my dad died just as I was getting pregnant with her.

And then, my not quite 9-year-old daughter, replied, “We are the lost and found people.”

Whoa.

I’ve often thought of those months when I was writing a book about my dad, his remarkable life, our connection, and the reward for being open with him when Miss O was in utero. It felt like a dance between birth and death. I was saying good-bye to having him present in life as I waited for Miss O to come. Such a sacred dance.

But Miss O’s comment about lost and found people made me think that maybe we all are. It seems like many new chapters are ushered in after we’ve given something up: a job, a partner, a story we believe about ourself.

And then, when we’ve given it up, we can proceed. Seems like the trick is not to get mired in the lost, so that we keep working towards the found.

We are the lost and found people. I couldn’t be more grateful to my beautiful daughter for pointing that out.

(featured photo is my dad and me when I was 2-years-old)

My book about my journey to find what fueled my dad’s indelible spark and twinkle can be found on Amazon: Finding My Father’s Faith.