How to Share the Next Generation

Things are always in transition. Nothing ever sums itself up the way we dream about.” – Pema Chodron

I had this quirky social anxiety when I started the fertility process to have my kids via in vitro fertilization (IVF). It seems so silly now. But at the time I kept thinking that because I was in the process of trying to have kids as a single parent that everyone would know that I was the one who wanted kids. Yep, that was going to be obvious. 🙂

It’s hard to say why that seemed important to me at the time – there is lot to unpack when it comes to family and gender expectations. And perhaps parents who get pregnant the traditional way have the same feeling of vulnerability. It’s hard to know because often family planning is done behind closed doors.

It’s one of the many reasons that I love Mari Sarkisian Wyatt’s book, Saving the Fourth Generation and our conversation on the How To Share podcast. She magically, with self-awareness and dark humor, puts words to the complexity of the IVF process and what it’s like to have goals and obsessions for which it’s worth suffering the ups and downs, grief and miracles.

Mari and I talk about the different types of goals we have as we go through life and her Armenian grandmother’s wisdom about what it takes to make them happen.

There’s so much legacy in Mari’s story because her quest is in many ways a response to the shattering trauma that came from both of her grandparents’ families being decimated in the Armenian massacre of 1915.

We talk about Mari’s way forward as the sole child of her generation to have kids. She tells us how she navigated both the price and process of IVF. Her story is heartbreaking, miraculous and completely gripping.

We talk about her advocacy for her autistic son and how writing about her IVF process, 20 years after the fact provided some healing and delight in the miracle of family.

Mari’s story involves a lawsuit so in accordance with the settlement she’s not on screen for this episode. Nonetheless, Mari is entrancing as she shares the power of her journey and the warmth of her voice.

I know you’ll love it.

Takeaways

  • This is the story of what women and their partners are willing to go through to have babies by IVF at the turn of the 21st century.
  • Mari’s quest quickly became an obsession and she notes obsessions can hurt the people you love.
  • Mari says if you just keep working toward your goal one step at a time, you might just succeed. Hopefully your family will forgive you.
  • Writing this book nearly 25 years after her IVF journey has been healing for Mari and her family.
  • The message is about resilience, personal growth, and the beauty of ordinary days.

Here’s a clip from Mari talking about her incredible book, Saving the Fourth Generation:

Here are some ways you can watch this amazing and thoughtful episode:

Please listen, watch, provide feedback and subscribe.

When should we celebrate progress—only at the finish line, or all along the way?In this episode of The Life of Try, Wynne Leon explores the power of small wins, tiny habits, and incremental progress. Drawing from a personal story about preparing her home for an Airbnb experiment during the World Cup in Seattle, Wynne reflects on what it means to keep going when growth is messy, nonlinear, and full of setbacks.Along the way, she connects insights from BJ Fogg, creator of Tiny Habits and director of Stanford’s Behavior Design Lab, with the long-term philosophy of Toyota’s Kaizen culture, where small daily improvements add up over time, and the practical courage found in the checklist mindset associated with Captain Sullenberger. This episode is about personal growth, habit formation, celebrating small victories, and learning to recognize that progress doesn’t have to be dramatic to matter.In this episode, we discuss: → Why celebrating small wins can help you stay motivated even when progress feels slow or messy → How BJ Fogg’s Tiny Habits approach shows that tiny celebrations can reinforce lasting behavior change → What Toyota’s Kaizen philosophy teaches about the long-term power of small, consistent improvements → How checklists and small-step courage can help you keep going when you feel overwhelmed or stuck → Why growth often looks nonlinear, and how to recognize progress before the final result arrives → How honoring effort along the way can help you build resilience, confidence, and momentum If you’ve ever felt stuck, overlooked your own progress, or wondered whether the little steps count, this conversation will remind you that they do. Small wins matter. Tiny steps matter. And trying counts, even before the big outcome arrives.🌍 Show notes and more inspiration: https://wynneleon.com🔔 Subscribe for more: Subscribe to The Life of Try for more conversations on: personal growth, creativity, reinvention, resilience, writing, and mindset.ABOUT ME: Hi, I’m Wynne Leon — host of The Life of Try, a personal growth and self-improvement podcast exploring resilience, reinvention, uncertainty, and the courage to keep trying. Through thoughtful interviews, reflective conversations, and real-life stories, I share insights to help you navigate change, get unstuck, and move forward with more intention.🌍 Website: https://wynneleon.com━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━🎥 Watch Next➡️ Letting Go Of Outcomes: The Mindset That Keeps You Moving➡️ 48: How to Get Unstuck: Michael Yang on Saying Yes, Resilience and Coming Alive➡️ How to Reclaim Fun in Adult Life | Mike Rucker, PhD, on Joy, Burnout and the Fun Habit🔗 CONNECT WITH ME:• Website:→ https://wynneleon.com/• Instagram:→ https://www.instagram.com/wynneleon/• Facebook:→ https://www.facebook.com/wynne.leon/
  1. How to Celebrate the Try
  2. How to Reclaim Fun in Adult Life; Michael Rucker, PhD on Joy, Burnout, and The Fun Habit
  3. Reinvention, Resilience and The Courage to Try| Lindsey Goldstein on Gap Year
  4. 51: Letting Go of Outcomes: The Mindset That Keeps You Moving
  5. 50: How to Write the Book You've Been Meaning to Write | Dr. Victoria Atkinson (Slivers)

Links for this post:

How to Share the Next Generation transcript

Saving the Fourth Generation from Delphinium Press and on Barnes & Noble and Amazon

(featured photo from Pexels)

Certainty for Today

May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.” – Nelson Mandela

My internet browser keeps trying to bait me to find out who I’m voting for 2024 election. It presents headlines from one side or another to see what I’ll click on.

From my point of view, I don’t want to click because I don’t want it to feed me what I want to hear. It’s not that I’m uninterested or uninformed. In these days before this hotly contested election, I’d love to have some certainty. But not at the price of wrong information and expectations that will lead to disappointment.

So instead I’ve made my list of the things I’m fairly certain will happen today:

The sun will rise and set.
That I’ll feel moments of awe, angst, and amusement.

Cooper the dog will put something in his mouth that he’s not supposed to.

And I’ll eat a little or a lot of Halloween candy.

Miss O and Mr. D will make me laugh
and some toys will be played with.

I will not make it through my to-do list.
But I will accomplish enough of my must-love list.

We’ll learn something, spill something, and read something.
One kid, or both, will anger the other and apologies will have to be made.

That amidst the rush and hustle of daily life with a nine-year-old and a five-year-old,
I’ll feel the overwhelming gratitude and love that I was able to choose to have this family
Using IVF.

And that’s why I never needed to open my browser to figure out which way to vote. I voted for Kamala Harris so that other families can choose, if they need to, to have days filled with the same types of certainties I’m likely to have today.