“When we cannot find contentment in ourselves, it is useless to seek it elsewhere.” – Francois de la Rochefoucald
My kids have been watching Inside Out on repeat lately. For anyone who hasn’t seen this movie or doesn’t have kids who watch things over and over until they wring out all the meaning they can, it’s a Disney movie (released in 2015) where we get to see “inside” an 11-year-old girl’s head. There’s a console in there where Joy, Sadness, Anger, Fear, and Disgust are running the show.
It has so many brilliantly done scenes. Like where the memory workers are cleaning up long-term memory and come to the piano lessons section. The worker with the clipboard says something like, “Keep Chopsticks and Heart and Soul and clear away the rest.”
Or when a bag of thoughts get spilled and the character of Joy says, “Oh no, facts and opinions look so much alike.” And the other character says, “It’s okay, they get confused all the time.”
It makes me think of my walk down memory lane this week with the story about the set up in college and then my dad’s sermon that talked about parenting and family problems. Neither of those are things I think about often. But I met a person that reminded me of my sister and it kicked off a little inspection of the things that came up.
When I look at how things have played out, I feel sadness for all my sister must have felt growing up believing she didn’t belong and the long-term impact that it’s had. There would have been a time that I would have been afraid to unpack all that. Now it’s just uncomfortable, but part of what’s made me “me.” And I can touch it and know that I’ll return to my mostly happy set-point, something that Dr. Stein has taught me in the many Sharing the Heart of the Matter podcasts he’s done with Vicki Atkinson and me.
In the movie, the little girl’s family moves from Minnesota to San Francisco. Inside the console of her head, we see Sadness touching memories and turning them blue. Joy wants Sadness to stay inside a circle and not touch anything else. But through 90 minutes of delightful back and forth, Joy finally understands that when Sadness surfaces, it’s part of what prompts us to reach out to others and share.
Miss O wanted to know why the memories turned blue. I answered that I thought that sometimes things are a mix of things. Like ice cream that sometimes comes with brain freeze. Miss O thought that it’s because without sadness, we don’t know what joy is.
Inside Out 2 is scheduled to release in June, 2024. Can you imagine the conversations we’ll have once we add Anxiety into the mix?
(featured photo from Pexels)
In this week’s episode of the Sharing the Heart of the Matter podcast, Vicki and I are talking about the latest book from author David Brooks, How to Know a Person. We delve into so many great things David Brook’s suggests in order to know someone else from the inside out.
Click over to Episode 64: Knowing a Person with Vicki and Wynne or Search (and subscribe!) for Sharing the Heart of the Matter on Apple, Amazon, Spotify or Pocket Casts.
Surprised By Joy 