feedback – Surprised By Joy

“Some of the best advice I’ve been given: ‘Don’t take criticism from people you would never go to for advice.‘” – Morgan Freeman

My dad used the Oreo method when he delivered feedback. It was fitting because he loved Oreos. Perhaps that’s what made him so good at layering in the salty truth between delicious goodness.

He’d start with what was working, add in feedback about what could be better, and then finish it off with a compelling overall vision or motivation. It sounds straightforward when laid out as a formula but as anyone who’s eaten fake Oreos knows, it has to be authentic to work. And the recipient needs to at least be a little hungry for it.

Feedback is tricky, isn’t it? It’s often necessary for us to fuel personal and creative growth, especially with writing, and we sometimes don’t want to hear it. That’s why I love this How to Share podcast episode with Dr. Vicki Atkinson because she is such a pro at both giving and receiving feedback.

Vicki tells us about her project in the works, a novel that builds on her fascinating and intriguing family history. She has done the hard work to not only to write but also to seek out and incorporate feedback. She tells us what she learned from her doctoral dissertation about separating the ego from the work and how that is an essential part of being able to really take in someone else’s input.

We talk about asking the right questions when someone solicits our feedback and also being specific when we want input. And Vicki shows us what having a growth mindset looks like when it comes to incorporating comments.

Vicki walks us through the discernment necessary to pick out what is helpful when it comes to feedback and gives us permission to disregard what doesn’t fit.

This is a great conversation about this tricky subject and Vicki’s wisdom shines brightly through. I know you’ll love it.

Takeaways

Feedback is a tricky subject that requires discernment.
Separating ego from work is essential for growth.
Asking the right questions can lead to more useful feedback.
Timing and context matter when giving feedback.
Not all feedback is created equal; choose your sources wisely.
It’s important to let your work develop before seeking feedback.
You can choose which feedback to integrate into your work.

Here’s a great clip of how Vicki practices the art of letting go of the ego:

Here are some ways you can watch this inspiring and helpful episode:

The podcast player embedded below
Click this link to watch in a browser: How to Share Feedback with Dr. Vicki Atkinson
Subscribe to How To Share on Spotify, Amazon Music, or Apple Podcasts
Subscribing to the YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@howtosharepodcast

Please listen, watch, provide feedback and subscribe.

How to Celebrate the Try – The Life of Try: Personal growth, one try at a time.

When should we celebrate progress—only at the finish line, or all along the way?In this episode of The Life of Try, Wynne Leon explores the power of small wins, tiny habits, and incremental progress. Drawing from a personal story about preparing her home for an Airbnb experiment during the World Cup in Seattle, Wynne reflects on what it means to keep going when growth is messy, nonlinear, and full of setbacks.Along the way, she connects insights from BJ Fogg, creator of Tiny Habits and director of Stanford’s Behavior Design Lab, with the long-term philosophy of Toyota’s Kaizen culture, where small daily improvements add up over time, and the practical courage found in the checklist mindset associated with Captain Sullenberger. This episode is about personal growth, habit formation, celebrating small victories, and learning to recognize that progress doesn’t have to be dramatic to matter.In this episode, we discuss: → Why celebrating small wins can help you stay motivated even when progress feels slow or messy → How BJ Fogg’s Tiny Habits approach shows that tiny celebrations can reinforce lasting behavior change → What Toyota’s Kaizen philosophy teaches about the long-term power of small, consistent improvements → How checklists and small-step courage can help you keep going when you feel overwhelmed or stuck → Why growth often looks nonlinear, and how to recognize progress before the final result arrives → How honoring effort along the way can help you build resilience, confidence, and momentum If you’ve ever felt stuck, overlooked your own progress, or wondered whether the little steps count, this conversation will remind you that they do. Small wins matter. Tiny steps matter. And trying counts, even before the big outcome arrives.🌍 Show notes and more inspiration: https://wynneleon.com🔔 Subscribe for more: Subscribe to The Life of Try for more conversations on: personal growth, creativity, reinvention, resilience, writing, and mindset.ABOUT ME: Hi, I’m Wynne Leon — host of The Life of Try, a personal growth and self-improvement podcast exploring resilience, reinvention, uncertainty, and the courage to keep trying. Through thoughtful interviews, reflective conversations, and real-life stories, I share insights to help you navigate change, get unstuck, and move forward with more intention.🌍 Website: https://wynneleon.com━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━🎥 Watch Next➡️ Letting Go Of Outcomes: The Mindset That Keeps You Moving➡️ 48: How to Get Unstuck: Michael Yang on Saying Yes, Resilience and Coming Alive➡️ How to Reclaim Fun in Adult Life | Mike Rucker, PhD, on Joy, Burnout and the Fun Habit🔗 CONNECT WITH ME:• Website:→ https://wynneleon.com/• Instagram:→ https://www.instagram.com/wynneleon/• Facebook:→ https://www.facebook.com/wynne.leon/

Links for this episode:

How to Share Feedback transcript

Vicki’s book about resilience and love: Surviving Sue; Blog: https://victoriaponders.com/

My book about my beloved father: Finding My Father’s Faith

(featured photo from Pexels)