Tag: commitment

The Gift of a Good Host

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“If it’s the right chair, it doesn’t take too long to get comfortable in it.” – Robert de Niro

Not long ago I went to a luncheon at a friend’s house. The decor was perfect, the food was beautifully presented and delicious, the company was lovely.

And yet – I was uncomfortable. I was handed a glass of ice water with lemon when I arrived and there was no place to put it down. I kept my coat on because everything looked too perfect to be a coat repository. Everyone was standing around awkwardly before the meal began because it was too early to sit at the table and there wasn’t another alternative.

My takeaway was the being a good host is more than making things look “perfect.” It’s about making people comfortable. And this luncheon came back to me because this week on the Sharing the Heart of the Matter podcast, Vicki Atkinson and I turned the hosting duties over our HoTM partner, Brian Hannon. And he’s a very good host!

Brian’s roots as a journalist are on full display in this episode. He is such a fantastic interviewer. He coaxes out the lessons Vicki and I have learned in 100 episodes.

And he challenges us to think big to answer who would be on our celebrity guest list.

In some very delightful and prescient chit chat, we get to cheer on the Eagles in advance of their Super Bowl LIX performance.

Most of all, we have a great time celebrating the milestone of 100 episodes and taking a moment to appreciate what goes into starting, envisioning and maintaining a collaborative effort like a podcast.

We’re confident you’ll love the scenic and beautiful places we explore as we tell stories about making a podcast!

We know you’ll love it!

Search (and subscribe!) for Sharing the Heart of the Matter on Apple, Amazon, Spotify or Pocket Casts OR Listen to it from your computer on Anchor: Episode 103: Turning the Tables with Brian Hannon

Episode 103 Transcript

AND subscribe to our YouTube channel to see a video clip of each story: @SharingtheHeartoftheMatter.

Links for this Episode:

Episode 103: Turning the Tables with Brian Hannon on HoTM

Brian’s blog: https://writingfromtheheartwithbrian.com/

From the hosts:

Vicki’s book about resilience and love: Surviving Sue; Blog: https://victoriaponders.com/

My book about my beloved father: Finding My Father’s Faith

(featured photo from Pexels)

Pursuing Goals Passionately

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“The world needs dreamers and the world needs doers. But above all, the world needs dreamers who do.” – unknown-

When I was in third grade, Olivia Newton-John released her Totally Hot album. I had never wanted anything so much in my whole life (all eight years of it). My 25 cent allowance and lack of savings made a $7 album seem way out of reach.

The way I remember it, my mom thought it was a silly thing to spend money on and informed me I didn’t have enough money. But I wouldn’t be deterred. Eventually, I begged, borrowed, and did extra chores until I bought Totally Hot as my first album (and yes, it was a true vinyl album.)

I thought of this story when listening to the Ten Percent Happier podcast, The Science of Manifestation with Dr. James R. Doty. He has six steps for manifestation:

  1. Reclaim your power to focus
  2. Clarify what you truly want
  3. Remove the obstacles in your mind
  4. Embed the intention into our subconscious
  5. Pursue your goal passionately
  6. Let go of attachment to any particular outcome

[Side note: Dr. Doty also mentions the empty satisfaction of materialism, much preferring community and service for true happiness. For the record, I used Totally Hot to create dance routines with my friends. :)]

The Ten Percent Happier podcast also made me of blogging friend and author, Mark Petruska, who is a master manifester. So Vicki Atkinson and I talked with Mark in the latest episode of our podcast.

Mark tells us a great story about how he willed a campsite into existence. Even better, it was for his wife’s birthday! And it was in one of my favorite places – Mt. Rainier National Park!

We love Mark’s incredible mix of optimism, focus, and passion. So Vicki and I get him to elaborate how he harnesses the power of manifestation.

Building on the published work of Stanford professor, Dr. James Doty, we talk about the steps Dr. Doty suggests for manifesting outcomes in our lives. This isn’t just wishing for something, it is digging one’s heels in and passionately pursuing an outcome.

Which Mark illustrates beautifully with a great story about manifesting a refund.

This is a great episode about the power of setting our intentions, not listening to naysayers, and manifesting the things that are important. It’s inspirational, powerful, and fun!

I’m certain you’ll enjoy the scenic and beautiful places we go when we share the power of story.

We know you’ll love it!

Search (and subscribe!) for Sharing the Heart of the Matter on Apple, Amazon, Spotify or Pocket Casts OR Listen to it from your computer on Anchor: Episode 80: Mastering Manifestation with Mark Petruska

AND subscribe to our YouTube channel to see a video clip of each story: @SharingtheHeartoftheMatter.

Transcript for this episode: HoTM episode 80 transcript

Links for this Episode:

Mark My Words – MARK PETRUSKA | WRITER

Ohanapecosh, By Gosh! – Mark My Words (markpetruska.com)

(featured image from Pexels)

To Dance or Not to Dance?

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“We’re fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance.” – Japanese Proverb

The other day a friend and I were talking about a conflict that’s arisen in her multi-decades marriage. She’s taken up ballroom dancing and loves it. It engages her mind and body in a way that feels like something generative and renewing. She loves studying the movements and the thrill of putting it all together.

Her husband doesn’t have any interest in doing it with her but also has a problem with her dancing with other partners. At times the thought of her dancing with someone else makes him feel queasy. He wants her to quit.

Before I continue, I must interject that these are both very smart, well-intended, committed and gracious people. This particular conflict occurs amidst the backdrop of a loving marriage, not as a crack in something that is already falling apart.

As my friend has progressed with ballroom dancing, she’s learned a great deal – but there have also been injuries that come with learning something new and moving in different ways (usually minor). Every time she has an injury, she wonders if this is a sign that she should quit or if she is learning to push through adversity. And every time it renews the conflict in her marriage. To push through both an injury and the resistance of having her husband against the idea is more than twice as hard but the idea of her hanging up her dancing shoes makes her feel sad and a little robbed of joy.

This is where things become muddy for me. First as someone who has been single for over a decade, I am sorely out of practice at compromise. But mostly because it seems to me that this conversation, and maybe most conversations where we can’t be supportive of what someone else wants to pursue with good intentions, are about something else. Unresolved conflict, old stories, wounds that haven’t healed, insecurity?

When I look at the situation, I can see the ripple effect that comes from one person forcing another to quit something they love. But it’s of course far more complex with that when you have more than two decades of history. It seems like my friend and her husband are already dancing but somehow have gotten out of sync.

So how do they find the wisdom to get back in step?

(featured photo from Pexels)

A Question of Love

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“The Eskimos had fifty-two names for snow because it was important to them: there ought to be as many for love.” – Margaret Atwood

Yesterday in the car, Miss O asked me who she should marry. Off the top of my head I said, someone who is kind, honest, funny and smart and then stopped to ask what she thought. She added, “Someone who is sweet and who likes to kiss.”

I started laughing and she explained that not all boys like to kiss which I’m sure is accurate in the 7-year-old world.

But it made me think of all the times I’ve wondered who I should love and the answer started with loving myself.

And it made me think of that WHO I should love is also an acronym for HOW I should love which I found is best with conviction, patience and kindness.

It reminded me that sometimes the answer to the question isn’t who I should love but am I brave enough to try.           

Finally, I landed on what is with age becoming clearer to me is that when I tap into the Oneness of things, I find it easier to love everyone, even the people that get my goat because when I look closely there is something about them that reminds me of me.

Miss O has about 20 years until she reaches the average age of brides in this country. I hope that in that time she learns a little about love, especially self-love, before she does.

What’s your list for what to look for in a partner? And your best advice about love?

(featured photo from Pexels)