The first time I shouldered a full backpacking load, I was 20 years old at the base of a hiking trail in the Ecuadorian Andes. I didn’t have the strength to lift my pack, rotate it around to my back, and then hoist my shoulders through. So the leader of the trip suggested I balance my pack on the ground and then sit down next to it and snake my arms into the straps.
So I did that – and promptly tipped sideways.
I mention this because that’s how I feel this fall. I keep tipping over when I try to carry my load. The balance is off and I can’t quite get grounded enough underneath it to shoulder it with any steadiness.
Both my kids need help with school. My 11-year-old daughter is doing fine at middle school but it’s 6 periods and a lot of additional activities. Keeping track of what goes where and what is due requires some organizational skills that she’s still developing.
And my 7-year-old son isn’t liking 2nd grade. His teacher is new to the school and the district has pared back on recess and amped up math time. It’s a rhythm that he’s finding challenging.
So I bike with him to school to help him get some exercise in before the day starts. Then I bike home and get my daughter off. By that time I’ve spent almost 2 hours getting my kids ready for school. And I’m in transition at work as well so I finding it hard to settle in myself.
Bumpy. That’s how it feels.
I mention the backpack because it’s the way I know for carrying loads. The lesson that I’ve learned repeatedly is that when I am having trouble carrying things, it’s usually because I’ve added them on without repacking. You can’t just stuff new items in the outer pockets, carry extra items in your hands, or clip them onto the top. If you do, they’ll hit you in the face every time you lean over – or you’ll drop them.
When I’ve resisted repacking my pack, it’s usually because I’m scared the group is going to go without me or that I’ll lose my momentum. But I’ve learned it’s not sustainable to carry an unexamined load.
Pull everything out
Give back what’s not yours to carry
Discard the baggage that you no longer need to haul with you
Repack only what is essential
Then you can shoulder a load that you can carry. My apologies if I miss anything while I’m repacking. I hope to be back to my balanced way forward soon!
(photos is of Miss O carrying a backpack at age 4)
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Take your time, Wynne. I like that you’re so hands-on.
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Well said, Wynne. I think that for many, the imbalance includes their children’s needs, work, the changes that speed through the days, and the fear (spoken or not, and written or not), of what is to come on the world stage. We are better when we seek the balance our friends can help with. You will find yours. You are a powerhouse.
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Great analogy Wynne! Something we all need to do and I’m hanging on to this example for my own needs. Thank you 🙂
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A mother’s load keeps changing, keeps increasing as the kids get older! The transition is the bumpiest, learning the new steps to this intricate dance!
My two oldest grandkids are in college, so no more day to day stuff with them, it’s bigger life stuff my daughter needs to drive 3 hours each way to take care of for them.
The youngest has a packed extracurricular schedule with band, marching band, Beta, and now she wants to join math club. I asked when they were goi g to get some sleep, lol, between work, schooling and homework (for both since my daughter is back in college too) practicing g music and playing in competitions which includes travel to other High Schools.
It’s so complicated! Especially at the beginning of a year.
You can do this!
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What a perfect analogy, Wynne! I love this idea of taking it all out and seeing what’s unnecessary and taking up space.
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The start of a new school year is A LOT – for everyone, I think. I think you’re doing a grand community service today for many of us who feel the need to recalibrate. Thank you for the nudge about repacking…might be just the thing I need at the moment, too. Much love to all! 💝💝💝
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Your theme of ‘repacking’ fits in perfectly with my intentions of this week’s ‘detoxing and decluttering’. I love a lot of my life but some of the things/meetings/obligations/clubs/people I love are overwhelming me (I ‘almost’ miss covid days of not being able to go anywhere). I need to figure out where I want to put my focus, which is hard when so much of the world desperately needs our attention/action/time/money. Time to “Repack only what is essential”.
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This is so good, Wynne. I think I am ready for a repack!
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That is exactly how I feel lately. Getting everything done and then some is burdensome. I know my sixth graders are making strides and learning new skills. For some it’s challenging, but they are being pushed to learn and grow. That sounds exactly like what O is experiencing, but she’s ready for the challenge, exactly like you were the first time you carried a full pack. Take care and enjoy a bonus day off!
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This is so good, Wynne! A great reminder to give back everything that’s not ours to carry. As we know it’s often easier said than done, but so necessary. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. May you find the balance you need.🙏🏽💕🌺
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I love this, Wynne! Sorting through it all and letting go of what’s unnecessary is such a smart way to think about it
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A great post. We all need to repack from time to time. Juggling life as a mom is always a challenge!
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