The Mysterious Case of the Barking Dog

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“In school we learn that mistakes are bad, and we are punished for making them. Yet, if you look at the way humans are designed to learn, we learn by making mistakes. We learn to walk by falling down. If we never fell down, we would never walk.” – Robert Kiyosaki

On a recent afternoon I was going through the mail in the mailbox and found an unsigned, handwritten note on a plain piece of paper that read (including word error),
“Please do not leave you dog out barking. It is unpleasant for neighbors.”

My ten-year-old daughter, Miss O, saw the look on my face as I tried to discern the message. She came to read over my elbow. Sensing a family meeting, six-year-old Mr. D wandered over and asked what we were doing. We read the note through one more time.

“But Cooper doesn’t bark,” Mr. D said. And he’s right, Cooper isn’t a barker. He’ll steal your socks and your steak but he’s quiet about it.

“And we don’t leave him outside,” Miss O added. Also true. Cooper is in the habit of lying on the front porch to watch the neighborhood but that’s when we’re home and the door is open.

“Maybe they have us confused with someone else,” I mused.

We couldn’t figure out the note but we were united in our righteous indignation in defense of Cooper’s honor. Mr. D suggested he rip up the note and throw it as far as he could.

It wasn’t until the next morning in the shower that I connected the dots. One day the week before we were getting ready to leave the house so that I could drive the kids to camp. Cooper was out on the front porch. I called him in and locked the door.

But when I came home about 90 minutes later after dropping the kids and picking up supplies, Cooper was on the front porch and the door was unlocked. One of the kids must have opened the door to check the weather and Cooper snuck out. He wasn’t barking when I came home so I didn’t realize it right away. He must have barked when he realized he was trapped out there.

The funny thing was that I almost didn’t tell the kids once I figured it out. Our righteous indignation felt so comfortable that I kinda wanted to keep wearing it.

But I also know that it builds up over time. The vulnerability of confession doesn’t come naturally to me, but I’ve found owning my errors and frailty keeps my pipes clean. Everything flows better when I don’t let the grime build up. More than that, I feel everything more fully when I shake off the protective coat of righteous indignation or defensiveness.

And it creates space for learning. When I told the kids my solution to the mysterious case of the barking dog, they both nodded and went, “Ooohhh, right!” I bet we’ll remember that lesson.

(featured photo is mine)

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram @wynneleon

I host the How to Share podcast, a podcast about collaboration – sharing leads to success.

I also co-host the Sharing the Heart of the Matter podcast, an author, creator and storytelling podcast with the amazing Vicki Atkinson.

71 thoughts on “The Mysterious Case of the Barking Dog”

  6. “He’ll steal your socks and your steak but he’s quiet about it.” This had me howling, Wynne!! And what a great lesson about recognizing when we’ve made a mistake; it’s only then we can learn.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. I tend to feel as some others- a one time thing and suddenly a note shows up?! That neighbor seems to have been in a seriously cranky mood for some reason and it probably wasn’t Cooper at all.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I feel that too, Deb. Must not be someone that knows us or they’d be worried why he was out there. I love your insight – it was someone who was already irritated. I bet you’re right!

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I’d still rip up the note and throw it as far as I could. 😂 I get so annoyed by cowardly people who don’t have the mettle to share that feedback non anonymously. But you’re a better person than I by making it a good learning moment for your kids!

    Liked by 3 people

  13. You’re fortunate your neighbors left you a note. We had a dog in our Palm Springs neighborhood who was left out in the front yard and was a constant barker. We couldn’t hear him from our house, but only when we walked by. It was a Malinois, which is a very active, smart but high strong breed that needs lots of attention. The next door neighbor took the dog and drove it out into the desert. The owner got it back through the pound because it was chipped.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Bah-humbug Wynne. Ha, ha, who could be annoyed by Cooper? Okay, I’m biased. And I agree that a barking dog can be annoying, but you’ve had Cooper for a number of months now. It’s not like he’s wandering the neighborhood barking day in day out. Let’s have some grace neighbors!!!! Ha, ha.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. We’ve been dealing with this exact situation for several months, though it’s much different than yours, which was a one-time accidental oversight. One of our neighbors often leaves his house (presumably to go to work) and leaves his two dogs outside barking repeatedly all night long. I assumed he had no idea, but now that I have brought it to his attention, nothing has changed in three months. His dogs literally bark most of the night to the point that we shut our window, put in earplugs, and sleep with pillows over our heads to no avail. After multiple calls from other neighbors and us to the police and animal control, it finally came to a halt. It still happens intermittently, but at least we’re sleeping now.

    I see your post about the importance of taking responsibility, even though it was simply an accident. What an excellent lesson for your kids!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, Pete – that sounds hard! I’m glad you’ve found a way to handle the situation. We’ve had barking dogs like that in the neighborhood (but thankfully not at night) and it’s grating at best.

      Thank you for your great comment!

      Like

  20. that actually was a great lesson for all of you as an adult and parent, to explain to your kids that you figured it out, and that you really have nothing to be upset about, it was the result of a mistake, and they both understood. excellent modeling and they’ll remember it. now for the adult who wrote the note and slipped it in your door instead of just coming over to talk to you about it nicely, they didn’t teach their child such a great lesson.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. I thought the same thing that it was another dog, Wynne. And that’s still a possibility (in my mind anyway.) Maybe someone was visiting a neighbor and they brought a dog with? Your explanation makes more sense, though. I’ll be curious if someone offers a confession of their own by running into you and saying “thanks, for stopping your dog from barking.” That has the potential for an interesting conversation.

    Liked by 1 person

  26. “Owning my errors and frailty keeps my pipes clean. Everything flows better when I don’t let the grime build up.” Strong truth and well said, Wynne! I too prefer to hang on to righteous indignation than admit my understanding was flawed. But you are so right. Sin of any kind (including misplaced righteous indignation) creates sluggishness in our spirits. Better to ‘fess up!” Thank you, Wynne, for the memorable reminder.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. I think Cooper is innocent, and it was probably the cat that was looking at you guys through the window the other day. That cat is trying to get Cooper in trouble, and I bet the note came from that house. 😂

    Liked by 1 person

  31. “More than that, I feel everything more fully when I shake off the protective coat of righteous indignation or defensiveness.”- I love that, Wynne! There has been a lot of righteous indignation going around in my tiny town lately and it’s a burden. I would have felt the same way you and the kids did though! Glad everything is okay. 💙🩵💙And a little barking now and then is just fine- dogs need to have their say! (Though they should never be neglected the way Pete’s neighbors have done. Poor things! And awful for Pete and his wife and everyone else!)

    Liked by 2 people

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