The Difference Between Want and Need

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“Recognize what is simple. Keep what is essential.” – Lao Tzu

Yesterday morning, our first morning after returning from our road trip, I looked around the house and had a good laugh at the evidence of our settling in. I’d relished being home by sitting on my meditation cushion with all my meditation books around me. Five-year-old Mr. D played with all the sports equipment. And nine-year-old Miss O had gathered up all the materials and made slime.

It’s a defining act to travel. We pare down to essentials so that we can go on adventures. It forces us to know what’s vital to our health and sanity and pack accordingly. I’ve seen climbers who cut the pages out of a book because reading is important to them, but they don’t want to carry the whole weight.

Of course for our cushy road trip visiting friends who took great care of us, it’s not nearly as stark. But still, I couldn’t bring all my meditation books, D had to pare down to only some baseball gear, and Miss O could only bring a couple of stuffies.

But I love the way we better appreciate the luxury of all of our comfort when we come home. It feels as if part of traveling is helping us know what is essential for peace of mind wherever we go. We’ve come home a little wiser about the difference between what we want and what we need. Which is an important thing to know.

(featured photo from Pexels)

You can find me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wynneleon/ and Instagram @wynneleon

I host the How to Share podcast, a podcast about collaboration – in our families, friendships, at work and in the world.

I also co-host the Sharing the Heart of the Matter podcast, an author, creator and storytelling podcast with the amazing Vicki Atkinson.

92 thoughts on “The Difference Between Want and Need”

  1. Amen to this:

    “We’ve come home a little wiser about the difference between what we want and what we need. Which is an important thing to know.”

    Liked by 4 people

  3. Wise nuggets of truth here, Wynne! I got a smile envisioning the 3 of you in your little separate little worlds, yet together appreciating the moments you have together.
    Great opportunities for appreciation and accessing what’s important!! 🩷🩷🩷

    Liked by 4 people

  4. Ha ha so true! We didn’t check our bags on our last trip and had to do laundry.. We survived with our hand luggages. Travel does teach us minimalism 😀! But yes it is good to be home with all the luxuries!

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Word. It feels as if part of traveling is helping us know what is essential for peace of mind wherever we go. That’s what makes it important beyond learning about new places. You find yourself along the way.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Thanks, Wynne. The difference between wants and needs is easy to know in theory. It’s a well rehearsed principle. Working out the details in our ordinary everyday life, I find, isn’t always so straightforward – but it’s more important and much more rewarding

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Ah, I love this comment that points out the difference between theory and in practice. And since you just returned home, I know you appreciate the feeling of returning home as well. Thanks, Malcolm!

      Liked by 2 people

  11. Adventures are awesome! Sucks being separated from your books.

    I recommend the small Kindle reader. My daughter has one and bought one for me too. It hold a lot of books and holds a charge for a long while. I can read every night before bed for DAYS and days, before it needs to be recharged. She bought me the case too, so it’s protected. I now put it in my purse so if I’m stuck waiting somewhere I can read instead of getting on my phone.

    My daughter still buys the physical books to have on her bookshelf. They’re “trophy” books!

    https://a.co/d/g7pclAq

    Liked by 1 person

  12. That’s a loaded question. Pairing down means carrying less and having to haul less. We are traveling for 15 days and I only brought four pair of pants and five pair of shorts, knowing that I would change outfits and we’d be able to wash things. I looked in my suitcase this morning and it looked empty, but I know it wasn’t. Yesterday we took two trains from Wales to London and then a taxi to another train station, finishing with London to Paris. Ot was smooth sailing or training. It would have been much more challenging had I overpacked. But here’s the catch there is probably going to be something I brought that I didn’t wear or use! I am at the stage in life where I need to focus on leas stuff. It’s a great lesson to learn early.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Such a good point about how overpacking complicates things, Clay! I’m so glad it was smooth sailing – that’s a lot of connection points. You’re right – it’s good to focus on less stuff! Hope you enjoy the rest of your travels, my friend!

      Liked by 1 person

  13. I love this soooo much. The return to home, hearth…I always think it’s fascinating to see what travelers gravitate to when they return home. Very revealing…so, so good! Beautiful, Wynne. 🥰

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m so sorry for your loss, Duke. You are right – those defining moments provide stark contrast between want and need. Sending prayers.

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      1. To say its awful is an understatement. Max Lucado in his May 27 th devotion describes it best. It is a gut wrenching pain that can’t be described.It’s been over 3 months now but it is a raw for me today as it was back then.

        Liked by 1 person

  16. My kids’ school always talked about needs and wants. It’s true when we go on vacation we limit what we bring. We rent a small one-bedroom, one bath cottage at the beach each summer. I pack a few books, journal, my laptop sundresses, bathing suits and a few shorts and tshirts. That’s it!

    Liked by 1 person

  17. My favorite travel-related quote is from Jack Kerouac, who knew a thing or two about hitting the road:

    I was surprised, as always, by how easy the act of leaving was, and how good it felt. The world was suddenly rich with possibility.

    And that is why I don’t just want to travel. I need to!

    Liked by 2 people

  18. Wynne what a great post.
    I wish I vould pare down and go minimalistic.
    We do need very little and I think for whatever reason, we over buy!
    I could start a fashion boutique with the clothes I have 😅 because I spent years working in thrift shops 🙄

    Liked by 1 person

  25. This all makes sense to me, and you are teaching your children to make choices. Isn’t that part of becoming an adult? One day, I’ll get there. 🤣

    Liked by 2 people

  26. Welcome back! There is something so nice about that initial return to the comforts of our home that feels so relaxing and special – whether it’s slime or sports equipment. Gotta say I chuckled at the thought of climbers cutting pages out of their because they needed to read. So so clever!

    Liked by 1 person

  28. “We pare down to essentials so that we can go on adventures.” So true! And when I get home, it’s often the best time for me to purge things that have been calling to go for a while. Suddenly, I find that I don’t need them anymore. When I worked on ships around the world, I fit my life into two duffle bags and a carry on.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I love your comment about timing — I’d never thought of that but it makes sense that coming home is a great time for the purge. And two duffles and a carry on? Amazing!

      Liked by 1 person

  30. Love this perspective – truly captures the difference between wants and needs ✨Recognizing this distinction empowers us to prioritize what truly matters and cultivate inner peace.Thank you for inspiring this reflection! 🌿

    Liked by 1 person

  31. OK, you’ve touched a nerve with me. I am struggling with paring down to what is essential, not for a short trip, but for a move. I have time to prepare for the move, so I’m not packing yet. But, I am sifting through possessions in our home with 30 years of accumulated stuff, trying to decide what I DO need vs what I MIGHT need, and hoping to make good decisions on both. It’s easy to identify things that I use regularly. But, things that I use occasionally? Sure, I could hold onto them so that I can use them when I want. But do I NEED to? Would I regret letting go of that one thing that sometimes brings me joy? Or would it lighten my load and allow for other opportunities? We have vowed that we will not move nonessentials, and we will reduce the clutter in our lives & simplify. But the struggle is real.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, I feel you, Gwen! Not about moving but about the occasional needs. I hate having to re-buy something and that makes letting go hard! Oh, sending you much love and discernment for this challenge!

      Liked by 1 person

  34. I can so relate. I have drawers of skincare and makeup at home but when I travel I take a couple of travel sized products in my makeup bag. It actually helped me realise how much stuff I didn’t need and I haven’t bought new products in over a year. Travel really does make us appreciate what we have at home while reminding us most of our material items are not necessary for our survival.

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  35. Absolutely! I learned how to pack seven days’ worth of clothes in a carry-on bag by using the bundle folding technique. It’s amazing how you can figure out the essentials when you do a lot of traveling.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, I need to look up the bundle folding technique. Better yet – look it up and teach it to my children. 🙂 I bet your years in the service made you efficient at packing a bag! Thanks, my friend!

      Liked by 1 person

  39. Thanks for this wisdom, Wynne. This reminds me of how much I loved our backpacking trips because what you need is in your pack on your back, no room for fluff. It’s so profound. 💞

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