A Piece of Advice

Posted in loveTagged , , , , , , , ,

“I always pass on good advice. It is the only thing to do with it. It is never of any use to oneself.” – Oscar Wilde

This was originally published on 5/18/2022. Heads up – you may have already read this.

“Enjoy this time, it goes so fast” is the single most repeated piece of parenting advice that I’ve heard since having kids. Since I chose to become a single mom at an older age than my friends, having my kids at age 46 and 50, I hear it both from my peers and the older generations which makes it bear even more weight for me.

My kids are now 2-years-old and 6-years-old – there are a lot of parenting years I have not yet covered. But in the phase of parenting I’m now in, there are very many life skills my kids haven’t mastered both in terms of basic care and feeding and also regulating the emotional ups and downs of life. It’s a very physical job that takes a lot of patience. But while I’m needed often for kissing boo-boos, the beauty of this phase is that my kids’ problems are small and my kiss can fix almost anything that happens to them.

Breaking the advice down and applying it to where I’m at: “Enjoy this time.”

Enjoy this time which means enjoy this phase that’s a lot of work and is full of ups and downs. Enjoy this time which means celebrating it even when my shoulders are heavy with the responsibility and worry for this family. Enjoy this time which means treasuring every drop of this intimate closeness even when it’s full of sticky, raw emotion both positive and negative. Enjoy this time which means cherishing the weeks when it’s completely impossible to complete my personal tasks and create a stable experience for my kids when they are sick, the world is sick, or even when I’m sick.

And then “it goes so fast.”

It goes so fast implies that if I look away for a second, it will change to something else. It goes so fast means that time is ticking even when it’s not fun. It goes so fast tells me that if I’m dreaming of a moment in which I can have a routine that isn’t so urgently tied to others’ needs, I will miss something unfolding in the life of today.

And back together, “Enjoy this time, it goes so fast.”

Enjoy this time, it goes so fast tells me to savor what I have. Enjoy this time, it goes so fast implies a richness to the mess of a life I have now. Enjoy this time, it goes so fast means that this is the heart of life experience beating right now.

Now that I break it down “enjoy this time, it goes so fast” doesn’t seem specific at all to parenting. Perhaps we all need this reminder to touch this moment we are in.

(featured photo is mine of me and my kids, at age 2 and 6)

48 thoughts on “A Piece of Advice”

    2. Exactly! Slowing down helps us, instead of cramming in as much as we can into our days.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. This advice goes way beyond parenting. I think we all get stuck in the “gotta get to the next thing” mindset and forget to just appreciate where you are, even when it’s messy.
    I love how you phrased it – “the heart of life experience beating right now.” That really puts things in perspective.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, Ally. I’m moving these posts over from the Wise & Shine blog where I posted it originally and it’s kinda fun to see these things from a while ago and pair them with a suitable picture from when they were written. This is one of my favorites.

      Maybe it’s a little like cleaning out your guest closet. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Such a great post, Wynne, and an important reminder in many areas of life. Now that my girls are 24 and 21, I can indeed confirm that it does go fast. I always embraced every phase and stage of my girls’ lives and I’m glad I did. Even so, I know there were times when I could have been more present.

    Liked by 3 people

  7. Enjoy this time is really valuable advice. If I remember correctly, do you practice meditation? That’s a good way for making the time to appreciate the current happenings in our lives 🌞

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Sometimes, I practice meditation. And it can be wonderful for calming my thoughts. I’ve found that taking a walk in a wooded area of my neighborhood can be meditative. Often, my thoughts will slow, and my breathing will feel more opened. 🌞

        Like

  9. I completely agree with both “enjoy this time” and “it goes fast,” but man, it’s so hard sometimes to enjoy it when you’re in the thick of parenting little ones. I look back on those early years with incredible fondness and nostalgia, but can’t honestly say I appreciated them for what they were at the time – at least not as fully as I could have. One of my favorite memories is rocking my newborn son to sleep in the middle of the night, but at the time, I was so exhausted myself, all I wanted to do was crawl back into bed. But I suppose enjoying that time in retrospect is better than never enjoying it at all.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. I love that picture of you three, which I know you’ve shared many times, and please keep doing so.

    A colleague once shared a similar advice with me and it is so true. I try to remember to enjoy this fleeting time when my T is driving me up the wall, because time is flying. Suddenly he’s almost 10 years old when he was just a toddler.

    Thanks for reposting this important reminder!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for the comment about the picture. It’s one of my favorites — obviously! 🙂

      Time is flying, isn’t it? Even when they are driving us up the wall. Yes!! It’s so lovely to have such similar age kiddos for commiseration!

      Hope you all ENJOY the weekend! 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  15. Simply lovely, Wynne! 💞💞💞 So very true on how fast it goes! How often we forget to enjoy the moment we are in, and instead are planning for, working toward, or eagerly awaiting the next ‘season’.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Great advice! Whereas my experience of motherhood hasn’t been one that flew by, I love holding onto treasured moments. I can still remember when my son was a toddler and had regular meltdowns in the grocery store, finally making it out to the car and taking a moment to stand there and give him a big hug, take a few healing breaths, and let us both calm down. I remember thinking to just take a minute to pause everything and hold my little guy. Hugs became one of my favorite parenting tools.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Thanks for the advice. I always find it challenging to transition from work to home life with the kids. I need a moment to myself, but as parents, we know that’s not always possible. As I see my kids grow older, I’m beginning to realize how quickly time passes (my oldest is already three). For example, when my son was just two, he would say, “I have an idea” whenever he wanted to play. He doesn’t say it anymore, and I miss it. It’s the little things that bring joy, and sometimes we don’t appreciate them until they’re gone.

    Like

Comments are closed.