The Monster of My Own Making

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“Fear is the cheapest room in the house. I’d like to see you in better living conditions.” – Hafiz

Eight-year-old Miss O told me that she is afraid to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night because she’s scared there could be a thief in my walk-in closet.

I told her about being scared of snakes and lava as a kid. I spent two whole years jumping onto my bed from about six feet out so that the King Cobras wouldn’t get me. I jumped off too.

Miss O thinks her fear is more reasonable than mine was. I asked why a thief would come into the room only to stand in a closet?

Funny how strange other people’s fears are when our own feel so familiar and fitting. May we all learn to shake off the monsters of our own making.

(featured photo from Pexels)

50 thoughts on “The Monster of My Own Making”

  5. Kids often take everything at face value. Adults have found ways to dismiss a lot as they mature. It’s often easy to forget our own early reality and responses to the way our brains perceive and work out uncertainty. It takes an in touch parent to recognize just how real that fear is and help a smart Miss O learn to manage it 🙂

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    1. This is a great though, Deb. I think many childhood fears stem from a scary situation, scene in a movie, story old by a friend, etc. I think it’s important to acknowledge the fears and help the child work through it (such as with asking the logical questions). Hopefully Miss O can over her fear.

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  8. I will try again. There are thee kinds of monsters. You are right about those we make, aka those we can control. Then there are the imaginary ones. Finally, those who are disguised as friends and benefactors, the ones most dangerous and hardest to identify. 👺

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  9. We often create and dwell upon having to cross bridges which we’ll never have to cross…including crossing paths with folks hanging out amongst the hangers in our closet.😊

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  10. I love that you’ve raised your children to be in touch with how the feel, and to communicate about it.

    One of my monsters was the dark, especially basement dark. That stuff’s scary. But I read an article a few years ago that talked about fear, and about how the only thing fear can do is make you feel afraid. It can hurt you or cause you harm in any way (though it is sometimes a legitimate warning). That realization changed things for me, including which lights I bother with when heading downstairs.

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      1. Such a good question, EW. She’s had the “thieves” thing for a few years which has always cracked me up because I can’t recall us ever using the word “thief” when talking about bad guys either in conversation or in movies. Maybe I should dig in to that.

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      2. Can’t wait to hear the story behind that! It could have been a show on tv? Something she heard from a friend? A story she read? And it could be an awesomely creative mind: maybe she wants to start writing stories?

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  11. My son was afraid of a woman in white who carried a large knife into his bedroom at night. Having him tell me about it scared me, too! He was around three years old and had nightmares.

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  12. That’s what’s so fascinating about fear. It’s irrational and no amount of logic can take it away. I’m afraid of heights, yet tall buildings and planes don’t frighten me. My fear relates to being in the open and feeling like I can fall. I know it’s illogical and I’ve made progress, but I just can’t get over it completely.

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  16. Such an interesting post, Wynne. And good for you for trying to walk Miss O through her fear. I’d personally be scared of someone in the closet too!

    We’re dealing, the past two nights, with T suddenly fearing the dark. It’s been quite disruptive to his and our sleep. Fear truly is irrational, isn’t it? Gotta find our way through them and to also help our little ones through them too. 🙏

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    1. That’s so interesting that T all of a sudden developed that fear. Have you figured out why? You’re so right about figuring out our own way through it and then helping our kids. Not easy!

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  17. Wynne, where you when I was 8? Love your advice, so special. “May we all learn to shake off the monsters of our own making.” My monsters now have nothing to do with closets or dark but they’re still just as powerful if we give them control! Love it Wynne.

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  19. Maybe a few nights with the door to the walk-in closet left open would help her. Or maybe a reorganizing of the closet so no one could reside in there! A night light in the closet . . . we could get very creative!💖

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  23. How cute. Poor Miss O, though. Incidentally, a dude in class last night mentioned that he was almost bitten by a king cobra in Thailand. I hope I see him again and have an opportunity to hear more of that story. I hope it doesn’t make it too scary for me to go to the bathroom during the night, however. 🙂

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