The Next 100,000 Miles

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“There’s a sunrise and a sunset every single day, and they’re absolutely free. Don’t miss so many of them.” – Joe Walton

This is a post I originally published on 2/8/2023. Heads up – you have have already read this.

When we celebrated our car turning 100,000 miles in December, we made the car a cake. After blowing out the candles, my seven-year-old daughter turned to ask me, “Are you going to be alive when this happens to me?”

I stalled for time by asking if she was talking about getting her own car to 100k. When she nodded “yes,” I replied “I hope so.”

My engineering brain wanted to calculate how many miles we drive a day while factoring in variables based on the future of transportation. But my existential brain kicked in and reminded me that I don’t know how many miles I have left in me. I just know what kind of miles I want to put in.

The Destinations

Get togethers with friends, adventures to find new ones, crossing bridges to help anyone who needs it are all on my priority list of destinations.

I want to use a good portion of the miles I have left to drive to trailheads and view points. And speaking of miles, I’ve put a lot of them on my knees and hips so the amount of hiking and climbing, if I ever get back to it, might be limited. But if we are driving to be among trees and mountains, I hope I can be happy no matter the activity.

Gathering supplies for silly things like car cakes that help us celebrate any and every milestone together, or just even a good day, seems worth doing. But overall, I want to spend my miles going on vacation together and fewer miles to IKEA to get more stuff.

When I can opt out of driving these miles in a car and instead travel them in an ecofriendly manner that gives our environment and world a healthier and longer life, I’m happy to change vehicles.

The Route

I want to set my internal GPS towards spontaneous miles finding love and purpose and away from those routine destinations ticking the box for obligation. And I want to heed that directional voice as it gives me help me find places that unlock the sense of adventure and possibility, instead of spinning wheels in the muck and mire. If given the option, I’d eliminate miles to to-do list meetings, corporate bullshit, and fruitless gatherings with ineffective leadership or heart.

If learning and laughter is part of where we are going, I’ll be happy to detour from any well-traveled road. I want to drive proactive miles to the things that keep us healthy and NO miles to the emergency room.

The Atmosphere

I want to put in connected miles, ones where we talk, laugh, or sit in companionable silence and gaze at the same scenery. I don’t want to put in disconnected miles where we zone out on attached devices. I understand that this will soon be out of my control, and that I’m part of the problem already when I encourage them to do it on mornings we have trouble getting into the car. But even when they choose their devices, I want my kids to know that I’d prefer to talk and listen to them.

Traveler’s Log

I know that regardless of the intentions I’ve put into the list, I get to control very few of these things except to choose to lean in when I take a “wrong” turn. Also, when lost, reconnecting to a desire to make meaning out of the detours.

I’d like to spend my remaining miles trying not to be locked in conflict or with my heart hardened towards people that have pissed me off. I want to stop avoiding my anger, sadness, or suffering but instead moving to approach all of the emotions of this amazing journey with empathy, awe & curiosity.

I hope to take fewer trips to regret. I’d like to be more readily willing to reroute to repair, apology, and appreciation of the unexpected path of life.

While I recognize I need to spend less time in overdrive and more time in idle, I also want to pass these miles not metaphorically (or actually) asleep at the wheel wondering how I got here but instead marveling at the scenery with gratitude.

When we reach our destination, I hope to remember, more often than not, to say a prayer of gratitude for safe travel.

I don’t know if I’ll be here when my daughter gets a car to 100,000 miles. If it takes til she’s my age (53), I’d be 99-years-old and the odds are slim. But if we are driving an open road between our hearts for any good portion of those miles, I’ll call it good.

I written a related post on the Wise & Shine blog about a road trip and making meaning from our experiences: The Universal You.

50 thoughts on “The Next 100,000 Miles”

  1. Pingback: The Universal You - Wise & Shine

  2. I remember this post and it’s a lovely read a second time. The same message still stands – the journey is often more meaningful and worthwhile than the destination. More drives and adventures with loved ones and less drives to regret. You live and created a wonderful life with your kids – and love how your mom is a part of those adventures. I have no doubt this will be mirrored with Miss O and her car and metaphorical car one day.

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  4. Ditto for what Ab said! May there be many wonderful miles ahead, full of wonderful memories! …and as you said zero miles to hospitals!

    Liked by 3 people

  5. The last time we purchased a “brand new” car, off the lot, was in 2004. Our daughter, who was 3 at the time, told us she wanted to buy it from us when she started driving. I laughed! We had never kept a vehicle that long! But…that’s exactly what happened. She’s been driving it for several years now. It has over 250k miles and just keeps chugging!

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  6. Such a great comparison! I do so love the thought of making meaning out of the detours. On the road, and in life, I got to some of my best adventures quite by accident. Love the post Wynne. And I love that cake!! The last time I had a car turn 100,000 miles I merely toasted it. I had a shot of bourbon and it had a shot of Pennzoil.

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  7. I used to emphasise the adventure of the road less travelled. To challenge myself with the new and be ready for the unpredictable. Now I’m appreciating more the routine, the regular, the unspectacular – the folk around me for whom the expected the reliable, the consistently dependable is important.
    I’m enjoying the value of all sorts of journey!

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  8. I love this: “I want to spend my miles going on vacation together and fewer miles to IKEA to get more stuff.” I’m in total agreement. I have all the stuff I need, unless I run out of something like toothpaste.

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    1. You have a good point about the nature of the motivation, Ally. Probably less about the odometer and more about the look on the little face asking me. 🙂 I appreciate you cheering me on! 🙂

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  18. I don’t even know what to say to this post, except that it’s got me weeping all over the place with a confluence of so many feels, I can’t fathom ever being able to name them all. Thank you. ❤

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  22. Absolutely LOVE this, Wynne 💞💞💞 I love the viewpoint and your perspective….and “I don’t know how many miles I have left in me” really resonates with me. Fantastic post! 💞

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