An Adventure

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“Jobs fill your pocket, adventures fill your soul.” – Jaime Lyn Beatty

Last weekend I took my kids to IKEA. I had to borrow my brother’s truck to do it. When the kids and I joined up with our family and friends later that day, and were sitting out on the stern of my brother’s boat to watch the Blue Angels, my sister-in-law commented that she couldn’t believe I took my kids with me. She said she gets stressed just going on her own. My friend, Eric, chimed in with a good-natured smirk, “She thinks of it as an adventure.”

Bahaha (I’ve gotten that laugh in writing from the delightful blogger and Cheryl Oreglia). But hey, he might have a point. I had the itinerary completely mapped, and packed a snack for each break. There were even ropes involved. It might not be a mountain climb, but it had some of the same elements.

I don’t know you all, but there isn’t anything like a project from IKEA to make me feel completely stupid. I say that even though I really love putting things together. But that first page, the one where you have to start assembling, and are looking at a wordless page indicating three or four parts from the dozens strewn around, and six or more screws, bolts, barrels, and dowels from the hundreds? Well, ugh!

Invariably, I do something wrong. Usually right out of the gate. This time it was to put those short wooden dowels in the wrong holes. And because I often get am racing to “completion,” I like to do it systemically, and did it for all the boards on the page. Then to make sure I was extra diligent, I hammered them in. Only to find out on wordless page number two that was wrong.

There was no way I found to get the dowels out, not pulling, or using pliers, or trying to make them cold in case the wood would contract. I had to drill them out. As I sat on the floor of Miss O’s bedroom with sweat running down my face and her loft bed still in pieces around me, I had to face that I was already on the wrong path, and had to go back to step one.

Huh, not entirely unlike a mountain climb after all.

Eric’s remark, even though delivered smirk, might have been right on the mark. It’s reminded me that of the adventures I’ve been on, they have all come with hard moments – and also learning and growth. The other thing they’ve all had, whether I’ve made it to the top or not, laughter, the satisfaction that comes with trying, and joy.

Last weekend I took my kids to IKEA. We got a loft bed with a side of adventure. Not a bad deal….

If you have a moment, please check out my Heart of the Matter blog post today about happiness versus joy: Good Mood of the Soul.

64 thoughts on “An Adventure”

  1. Pingback: Good Mood of the Soul – The Heart of the Matter

  2. Congrats on surviving your trip to IKEA! Brings back memories of when we used to take T for their meatballs, hotdogs and ice cream. Always need an incentive to take him. Assembling IKEA furniture is another adventure in of itself. Congrats on that too! 😆

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  3. I know that I’m in the minority, but I love building IKEA furniture and was also the first to volunteer when someone complained. 😆 It’s so valuable to designate detours and “mistakes” as an adventure… I do the same and it instantly transforms frustration into a good laugh, or at least a chance to look for the silver lining.

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    1. I like assembling ikea furniture too. My daughter and I did 2 metal loft beds for the girls,and that was a challenge. We kept putting pieces in reverse and having g to redo stuff.

      Good for you Wynne to look at it as an adventure!

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  4. To borrow an almost stated analog in what you wrote, Wynne, life is like a restaurant menu — many choices known and unknown. Chew on that.

    Liked by 5 people

    2. Or like Proust said “The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” You bring “new eyes” and new perspectives… even to a trip to IKEA! Thank you for sharing the new eyes with the rest of us!

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  5. Kudos to you for even trying! I just sit and stare at the oddball parts and pieces, try to decipher the Chinese instructions, and end up calling somebody to do it for me. No drilling out dowels for me! I leave that to the pros. 🙃

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  6. I busted up laughing at this: “I like to do it systemically, and did it for all the boards on the page. Then to make sure I was extra diligent, I hammered them in. Only to find out on wordless page number two that was wrong.” My laughter? Absolutely deep, knowing laughter, so that this is the laughter of appreciative connection.

    “the satisfaction that comes with trying” really resonates with me right now, too. I had a good sobriety-related conversation that led me to reflect upon a reminder I’ve hung just above my boxes of tea: “OUR WELL-BEING LIES IN OUR ACTIONS.” Whether or not I succeed, I regret way less those times when I tried and failed/missed the mark than the ones when I was too fearful to try at all. I thus rejoice to see and feel this sentiment here, today. ❤

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    1. I’m so glad you are laughing alongside me, Deborah. I’m in good company then!

      And so well said about trying – even the failures get me somewhere whereas not trying doesn’t get me anywhere!

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  8. You have the best adventures! I believe I’d consider the whole DIY bunkbed project as torture…because I’ve got zero construction skills, but I’m a fan of your spunk and your engineering heart, understanding parts and pieces and hanging in there until you get it right. I’d be crying in the corner! 🤣

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    1. Heck no – you’d be encouraging and laughing with your partner all the way through. And then adding your beautiful design flair to the end project. I’m grateful for all of that, my dear friend!! 🙂 ❤ ❤ ❤

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  9. I took my kids everywhere with me, including restaurants and shopping. My SIL would never do that and her anxiety would be so high if she did that her kids picked up on it and acted out. I hope you figured out the IKEA project. I’m usually pretty good at them because I make sure all the parts are there and read through the directions twice before starting!

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    1. Love this remark that the kids pick up on that anxiety. Yes!

      And your note to read all the directions first and lay out all the parts — that’s so good. I need to remember that next time because I like doing it but tend towards rushing. And not only with IKEA stuff but all of life! 🙂

      Thanks, EA! 🙂 ❤

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      2. Kids do pick up on our anxiety!! Yes, yes, yes! And as for your daughter’s bed – probably a great thing that she figured it out. Maybe you did that on purpose! 😉

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  10. Oh gosh, wordless page 2 delivers the bad news…. But those dowels had been well hammered in and weren’t moving! Reminds me of the time I decided to recover the dining room chairs. Nails or staples? Both?

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  11. When Alison requested a loft bed in childhood (maybe 5th or 6th grade?) the caveat was that we put it together as a team. She continued to be my go to teammate over the years for other “put together” furniture projects. I am still surrounded by some of those today. I rather enjoy the challenge and the sense of accomplishment much like I did this weekend putting up the AC for the first time! I’m with EA all the way though- you have to lay out all the pieces, cross-check with the pictures and read those directions a few times before ever picking up a tool 😉 I hope Miss O loves her bed!

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    1. Wuhoo on the AC, Deb!! It is such a sense of accomplishment for sure. I love that Alison did it with you – I need to remember that next time. My kids help with the small things but I haven’t brought them in fully.

      And Miss O loves her bed – thanks for that note! 🙂 ❤

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  12. Love this ” . . . adventures fill your soul.”! Y’all will enjoy the tale of your IKEA bed creating adventures for years to come, if only there were pictures with you and that drill!!! Sweet Dreams to Ms. O!

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  13. Ah yes. IKEA furniture is totally a mystery. When my daughter moved into her apartment last year, she live streamed herself putting together her bed. It was quite entertaining but she got it done in the end. Said bed is currently in my garage, partially disassembled and waiting for my niece to pick it up for her daughter. They have their work cut out for them.

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  14. I used to love those kinds of adventures. I would take the kids to the grocery story or some place like Ikea. I found it always came down to attitude. If you had a good attitude, it would work out. If you had a bad one, it would be torture. My problems with Ikea always come with putting the furniture together. Guess what slows me down . . . you got it, my lack of patience. Ha, ha. Hope Miss O likes her loft bed. Sounds like fun!

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    1. I think you honed in on the magic, Brian – yes, the attitude. I hadn’t quite figured that out but you nailed it.

      And about IKEA – yes, the patience. That’s always why I make mistakes too. Darn it! 🙂 Glad to know I’m in good company!

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  15. Is it all assembled now? (I was hired a few years ago to help w/ an IKEA kitchen…dang, that was a learning curve. Glad I was getting paid by the hour, and the homeowner was right along side of me both of us stumbling our way through it. I do feel your pain (adventure).

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    1. An IKEA kitchen. Whoa… I bet that was quite the “adventure.” I wonder if they get too big and then stop being fun? Probably not if you have good company.

      And yes, I got the bed together after a couple of nights of work. She loves it!! Thanks for commiserating with me, DM!

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      1. Good for you to get-r-done. You get an A+ for perseverance…you mentioned you had to drill the dowels back out (the ones put where they shouldn’t have been..what was plan B?..screw it together w/ screws? you got me curious. 🙂

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      2. Ah, I love that this sparked your curiosity, DM. Somehow that’s exactly how I imagine you – as someone who solves puzzles with perseverance, smarts, and curiosity.

        So, the top board of the footer (and header for that matter) had three holes in its side – two for long screws to go in and connect with a cam (not sure that is the right word but it was a little cylinder that provided something for the screws to connect with) that were inserted holes drilled perpendicular to the path of the screw. I put the dowels into all the holes but when I subsequently saw the holes for the cams, I knew I had just blocked the path. It was only the middle hole of the three that was for a dowel.

        The middle board of the footer only had two holes on its side and both were for dowels.

        The bottom board of the footer only had two holes on its side – and both were for screws that went into cams

        Once I figured all that out, I was cooking with gas. 🙂

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  16. Life is the grandest adventure of all…keep laughing and let it fill you, even when the wordless pictures give you the bad news that you made a whoops! 😉

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  18. I love IKEA, but I’m with you when it comes to assembling things. I always get it wrong. It’s even worse when there are only diagrams and illustrations. I’m a writer! I need words to understand things!

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  19. When the kids were younger, we took a few adventure trips to IKEA. All those rooms staged with furniture-how fun! I’ve only built a few small items from IKEA, and I’m not sure I would take on a full-sized piece of furniture!

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  20. You are brave and good at assembling IKEA furniture! I gave it up and don’t buy Ikea furniture anymore, also my husband hates them. Well, we love the design, but assembling them drives us crazy. Recently, I purchased an electric desk for my home office (also called standing desk) at a factory that delivered them to my employer, and in the end, it was only 100 Euros more expensive than IKEA! I say only because they deliver, they assemble and they offer support throughout the years. it was funny reading your experience Wynne!

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    1. That sounds like an amazing experience, Cristiana! How do you like the electric desk? I’ve heard those are supposed to be really good for us. And you make a good point that there are other options that aren’t much more expensive.

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      1. Dear, I have been using the electric desk since 2019 in the office and now that we can work from home up to 3 days a week, I decided to buy one. I think it’s really useful and helps you with your back as you have a correct posture of the body, especially the neck in my case. Think about it, and as you are very good with IKEA furniture, you can buy one from them. By the way, in Europe, IKEA also has restaurants with good prices and not bad quality. I don’t eat meat but my husband loves the Swedish meatballs.

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  21. Thank you for sharing!!.. I believe that every day is an adventure!!.. “Yesterday is a memory, tomorrow remains a mystery, today is a new adventure. Greet it with open arms, a open heart, a open mind and a smile. Enjoy it because it won’t come again.” (Larry “Dutch“ Woller ) … 🙂

    Hope your adventures are paved with love and joy and until we meet again…
    May your day be touched
    by a bit of Irish luck,
    Brightened by a song
    in your heart,
    And warmed by the smiles
    of people you love.
    (Irish Saying)

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  22. IKEA grabs me by the back of my ear and drags me back to my kids college years. They were the main source for dressers, night stands, and beds. Total nightmare especially if it was just me and the kid that had one foot out the door to attend some “gathering.” Now a days I’ll pay anything for the option “comes fully constructed.” I’m better at origami, puzzles and cocktails! Bahaha! 💕 C

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    1. Oh, the “one foot out the door.” There’s nothing like IKEA instructions and trying to hurry. I think you’ve got some wisdom in choosing the fully constructed, Cheryl. Add that to the list of wise things we learn as we age! 🙂

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