“People grow when they are loved well. If you want to help others heal, love them without an agenda.” – Mike McHargue
When I picked Miss O up from school the other day she handed me her mystery science project. It was a little plant in a shot size plastic cup. The experiment was for each table of two kids to divide up – one would leave their plant in the light and the other would put their plant in a dark cupboard for a week. They made predictions about what would happen.
Miss O’s plant was a little radish seedling that had been in the dark cupboard for a week so I was surprised to see that it had three little shoots popping through the meager soil. Miss O’s conclusion about why her plant survived the dark cupboard was that it could survive there but not thrive.
As she handed it to me, Miss O said to be really careful. She was super proud that it had survived. And I promptly bumped my hand and spilled it all over the seat. I scooped the little dirt back in, apologizing and trying to restore calm.
Then I handed it back to Miss O in the back seat and she spilled it. Holy cow – if this plant survived, it was going to be a miracle, not science! But I scooped it up once more and when we got home, put a little fresh dirt in, watered it and put it in the windowsill.
All the while I was thinking about the conditions for growth. I hazard to guess that we’ve all been in the dark cupboard for a week. I think I was in there for a couple of years as I went through my divorce and before I found meditation.
But when we make it through, what do we need to really thrive? For me, it’s meditation, sleep, time in nature, playing with my kids, and conversations with deep and thoughtful friends (online or in real life).
I often poison my soil by eating too much sugar and spending too much time in front of a computer but when I balance it out, I can feel my roots growing deeper.
Amazingly, Miss O’s little plant is doing great in the windowsill. If it keeps growing this way, it’s going to need a different container but I suppose we humans do that too as we navigate the different phases of life.
Excellent and worthwhile use of metaphor. Also, how nice you and Miss O didn’t murder each other doing the spills. Your career as a mother/daughter team of plant jugglers is in doubt.
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Agree with Dr. Stein! Miss O’s radish seedling is a tough one to have survived the dark cupboard, multiple fumbles, and being replanted. 😆 But such a great illustration about knowing what it takes to thrive – and sometimes needing a different “pot.” Thank you, Wynne!
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Kendra, I totally agree about that tough little radish plant. I wonder if they are all so resilient? And thank you for your kind comment!
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Oh, I don’t think there is any doubt about our career in plant juggling, Dr. Stein. It’s a definitely “no.” But I do think our career in nurturing is going to be fine. 🙂
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👍👍That’s something I am betting on!
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I’m imagining the chaos and hilarity in the car– two spills? I suspect it wasn’t funny in the moment, but there you are — lessons in resilience are everywhere – for the little seedling, plus you and Miss O. And your confession about ‘poisoning your soil’ with sweets? Ah yes. Does it help to know you’re not alone? 😉😉😉
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Oh yes, it definitely helps to know I’m not alone in that sweet thing! 🙂 And you’re right, the plant spilling was comical. Who would have thought we could bang that thing around any more? 🙂
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😉❤️😉
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Oh my, what a perfect metaphor. 😊
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Thank you, Jane! 🙂 ❤
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Thank you, Wynne, for sharing another great post with us. It’s wonderful to read about your children’s adventures and, in this case, science experiment. I’m also glad that you’ve found a way to restore balance to your life–so important.
Just wondering if you have ever tried the rice experiment by Dr. Masaru Emoto. It’s an amazing illustration of the power of our words. I did it several years ago (with small glass jars with lids that are easily purchased at dollar stores). I very specific with the experient–using the same rice, the same water, and even took a photo each day for over one month. On Day 8, the water in the jar marked “Love” began to turn golden, and its brightness continued to increase and the rice never became mouldy. Here’s a link to the presentation, in case you’re interested.
Wishing you and your family a very Merry Christmas!
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Thanks for the link to the presentation, Art. I haven’t ever tried that experiment although I’ve heard of it in passing. Isn’t that amazing? Thanks for reading and the lovely comment!
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You’re welcome, Wynne. The experiment is quite amazing, and your children might enjoy it. You’re welcome about the comment–a pleasure to read your posts!
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Wow! This is one powerful reminder of the impact of thought upon all—both animate and inanimate. Thank you!
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I agree, Julie. It’s quite amazing to actually experience. It might be worth keeping in mind that the human body is comprised of about 75% water. The words (defined as “cloaks of thought” by Charles F. Haanel, in “The Master Key System”) that we tell ourselves truly do matter. 🙏
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What an excellent comparison you made between the plant and human beings – it’s going to need a different container but I suppose we humans do that too as we navigate the different phases of life. Very nice story, thank you Wynne (Cristiana, just in case it will be displayed as anonymous)
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Thank you, Cristiana! Yes, isn’t it interesting to think about all our different “pots” in life? Thanks for reading and commenting. I hope you have safe travels and happy holidays, my friend!
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Thank you, happy holidays as well!
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“…what do we need to really thrive?”
Family? Relationships? Finances? Position? Food? Shelter?, etc, etc, etc. Depends on who you ask.
Life has shown this ole ragamuffin that the answer lies in 8 simple, but powerful “…make it through…”words:
“Be still and know that I am God” – Psalm 46:10
Be blessed Wynne.
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A beautiful and wonderful verse, especially for this season, Fred. Thank you! Have we talked about the Ragamuffin Chronicles? I love your self-reference as a ragamuffin! Merry Christmas, Fred!
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I’m definitely relate to plants. Sunlight nourishes every soul in my body, no matter the season. I lean toward it like love.
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I can’t agree more, Evelyn! Need that sunlight nourishment in every season! 🙂 ❤
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I meant every seasonal soul!
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Ah such beautiful insights Wynne. Of course we all find ourselves in the dark cupboard here and there in our lives, but I suppose the secret to survival is understanding what helps us cope, as you’ve illustrated yours. Provided they are healthy coping mechanisms, (and sugar 😄) then somehow we survive. The bonus is the insights we glean from the experience and the new shoots and roots that grow when we are back in the light.
Beautiful insightful post as always!
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Oh, Alegria – I love your “shoots and roots” and your wisdom that we glean insights from being in the cupboard that go with us as we grow. Beautiful comment! Thank you my friend!
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Clever and wise lady you are Wynne! A lovely post today 🙂
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Thanks, Deb. I’m not sure if it matters whether plants are in the cupboard or on the windowsill this time of year in our climate – it’s so dark! But thank goodness we still survive and thrive!
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Love this analogy! It really speaks so strongly! 🤩🤩
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Thank you, Tamara! We all need our light, soil and water, right? 🙂
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Yes, we’re all basically pla ts with feelings!
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Right!!
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This cute story reminds me of how messy life can be! As hard as we try to get it right with our loved ones, we spill things no matter how hard we try! But In the end life still goes on as did your precious little plant 🌱
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Ah yes, we spill things no matter how hard we try. That is so true, Victoria! And we pick up the pieces and go on. I love the way you put it and that cute little plant emoji!
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What a great school project, and life analogy. I often will purchase myself a plant, during or after a major life event, as it is a reminder to keep growing and thriving.
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I, too, really like the thought-provoking life analogy you made: what is it we need to survive… and to thrive? A wise neighbor once taught me that the mighty oak tree does not have deep roots, but it has very WIDE (horizontal-wise) roots that can keep an enormous oak thriving for many years: maybe the lesson is that we can work with what we have?
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Ahh, that’s very good, EW, as always. Maybe the lesson is also that we can all be spread out all over this crazy planet and still be connected?? So grateful for you, wherever you are!! 🙂 ❤
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I love how you said that: connectivity is key! We already decided we’re part of the same clan, and I’m grateful for that connection all over again!
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Me too, EW, me too!! ❤
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What a great way to memorialize something! I bet your life is beautiful with thriving things that way. Thanks for reading and commenting!
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Oh I hope that plant survives. That would give so much encouragement to your little one. Anyway we all need all the right ingredients to grow up too.
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I agree that it is a great story if we can foster it along! And yes, we all need the right ingredients. Thanks for reading and commenting!
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Lovely post.
What an amazing experience for Miss O! What started as a science experiment turned out be an important life lesson.
” Miss O’s conclusion about why her plant survived the dark cupboard was that it could survive there but not thrive.”
Then it spilled twice, and still survived.
You lovingly and carefully restored it with fresh dirt, water and put it in the windowsill.
Now the little plant has all the nourishment it needs to thrive. And, thrive it will.
Wynne, I hope to hear about Miss O’s reaction as the plant grows and is repotted in a bigger container.
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I love your recapitulation of the story, Chaya. No wonder you are such a great teacher and wise friend. You mirror back what we need to remember to grow. Thank you dear friend!
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Radish strikes me as a curious choice – doubt it will get to harvest size? Also, doing this at the darkest time of the year? Good luck anyway – will be interested to see how it progresses
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Excellent points. Now that you say this I wonder how I came to know this was a radish plant. Miss O must have told me. We’ll see what grows (or doesn’t)! 🙂
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Looks like radish… could maybe try some tomato seeds in the spring? Quick and easy
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Great suggestion. Thank you!
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That is a wonderful analogy and I did not expect the radish to survive. But what a wise comment from Miss O about thrive vs survive. We all have moments when we’re in the cupboard and how lucky we are to find our ways out to the sunshine eventually. 🙏
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Thanks, Ab. And I didn’t expect it to survive either. 🙂 Yes, we all have our time in the cupboard. Maybe it makes us hardier? Hope you have a great week!
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What a marvelous metaphor for life itself! The little plant experiencing the woes and hope of humanity—suffering and tragedy, neglect, accidents, love, caring, compassion. Survive or thrive. What a consciousness raiser about the impact that each one of us has on the kingdom of nature and on one another. Rich food for thought indeed! Thank you.
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I love how you’ve extended this metaphor, Julia! Yes, the woes and hope of humanity! May we all raise to the challenge to know our impact and raise our level!! Thank you!
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I’ve been thinking a lot about this recently. We poison our soil and chide ourselves for those specific actions. But I think we would automatically reject those actions if we were to have a bigger purpose.
e.g. can’t quit drinking when the focus is just on the habit. But it’s easier to quit when you have a purpose like wanting to be a better parent and not be so drunk around the kinds all the time.
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Such a great point, Stuart. You are so right about the bigger purpose and picture. I just heard a podcast Harvard professor and researcher Lisa Lahey say largely the same thing. Yes, we try to “willpower” a change when creating awareness as to what’s driving them works better.
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A very important quote and inspiration – “People grow when they are loved well. If you want to help others heal, love them without an agenda.” I can’t wait to hear the rest of the radish saga as time goes by!
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Oh boy – I’m going to have to keep it alive just so I can write about it. 🙂
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I radish your use of metaphors here!
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It’s hard to root for this pun…;)
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Admittedly, it probably belongs in the compost pile.
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Ohhh, I’m laughing. In the compost pile, where it’ll help another metaphor grow and sprout and begin again. 🙂
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Light, water and soil are essence of plant life. Thank you 🙏🌍
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Indeed! Thank you!
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You are welcome, Wynne 🙏
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All life comes from the same force. Thanks for reminding us!
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🙂 Thanks for commenting!
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