When I Write

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“The words you speak become the house you live in.” – Hafiz

This is a repost of writing I posted on 10/12/22 – heads up that you may have already read this.

The other day a friend was telling me how his dad, who was a professor in the business school at the University of Washington, wrote books. He’d shut himself in his home office and for two months would just sit there with a note pad nearby. Sometimes he’d watch a game or organize stacks of papers. When my friend would come in and ask his dad what he was doing, his dad would say, “I’m writing a book.” My friend would say, “Nah, you’re listening to your police scanner.“

And then in the third month, my friend’s dad would start typing and be done with the manuscript in a month.

After telling this story my friend turned to me and asked, “How do you write?”

I have a very specific time to write each day. It’s in the morning after I’ve gotten up at 5 or 5:30am to do yoga and meditate and before I get the kids up at 6:45 am. I tackle ideas that have been floating around my head because of things I’ve heard, read or have been struggling with.

That time of day for me is when I’m most hopeful, mystical, and quiet. I can hear the small whisper at my core and I have better access to my creative muse.

Then the day starts and its drop-offs, pick-ups, doing my day job. By the evening, my creative muse has been pounded into bits. It’s tired, critical and tells me I don’t have anything worth saying. I don’t look in the mirror at that time of day because I will find fault with what I see. I tend to be pretty quiet in the evenings because I’m as shallow as a muddy puddle and just as unclear.

So I almost always write from my renewed self and never include words from my salty self. As I laid this out to my friend, the downfall of my approach became apparent to me. It’s like cooking with only sugar and no salt. I write from a place from which I’ve shaken off the dust that collects during each day and even my suffering looks shinier.

I’m only covering about half (or less) of my human experience. Not the times that I say “sh!t, f*&k, d@mn under my breath when I step on a kids toy in the dark and definitely not when I very badly want to blame my kids for causing me pain. I don’t write in the times when it truly feels like nothing is going to work out. And certainly not the times when I feel like the life I’m leading is unrelentingly tough.

I can meditate later in the day and get back some equanimity. But there’s a Buddha quote that says, “Sleep is the best meditation.” Indeed it is my best way to remove the tarnish of life and reinvigorate my creative muse. But if I want to write about the fullness of life, I need to remember it’s the whole day experience.

My take is that my friend’s father wrote a book in one month because he had spent the time to gather himself and then could get it all down in one go. It’s a good reminder to me that I need to gather all of me to bring to the writing table lest I leave out all the spice.

I’ve also posted today about how my purpose for writing has changed at the Wise & Shine Blog: The Writer’s Mission Statement

(featured photo from Pexels)

53 thoughts on “When I Write”

  1. It would be funny if we labeled our posts with the suffix AM or PM to communicate whether the writer was the grumpy version of ourselves or the the optimistic, hopeful version😀..I agree, writing at different times of the day does add a different tone and dimension.

    Liked by 8 people

    2. What a delightful idea! GA or OA (Grumpy Author or Optimistic Author)!

      And what a fantastic example of the writing process. We seem to value busywork sometimes over thinking-work? 🙃 it reminds me of a quote I once read “If I had only an hour to save the world, I would spend 45 minutes defining the problem, and only 15 minutes finding the solution.” 😁

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      1. I love how this dovetails with your other comment, EW. Perhaps the majority of the time we take is just getting the problem defined as your quote suggests? So often we don’t take the time to know the problem we are solving.

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      3. Ooh, that’s so fascinating to ponder. It makes me think of emotions – so often I react to what’s going on in front of me but if I think about it, often there’s an undercurrent that is really driving it.

        Liked by 2 people

  2. I love what apeacefultree just mentioned above. Recognizing that your writing (and I think mine, too) can show the signs of being beleaguered at the end of the day, maybe a subtle warning to readers, LOL, would be a community service. I love the feedback you received Wynne – and embraced – about leaning into your ‘salty self’ and not only your ‘renewed self’. Such insight! 🥰

    Liked by 4 people

  5. I think if we truly want to write about life as we experience it then we have to do so not just from the grounded, peaceful POV but from that crappy POV at 830 PM on the most hellish day we can imagine. That’s where the real stuff comes out and isn’t writing about being real? Even fairy tales where the prince wins the princess are based on all the struggles they encounter before the happy endings.

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    1. I love the way you put it, Deb! Yes, isn’t that the meat of life? The funny thing is that I find myself not being able to make the connections to the ending at that point. So perhaps I have to write about those hellish days but save the endings for when I’ve figured them out??

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      1. I love that you can figure them out even if it doesn’t happen then. I still ponder over much in life, nagging little questions about things that won’t quite resolve. Keeps me supplied on my never ending ‘ask why’ journey 😉

        Liked by 3 people

  6. I’m also a morning writer. I run out of steam in the afternoon and evenings. I think you’re writing is hopeful because you do write early before the day gets hectic and tiring.

    Liked by 3 people

  9. I’d be interested in the darker side, Wynne, since you say we are getting an incomplete picture. You will be even more interesting!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Ha, ha, Dr. Stein. I try not to believe myself when I’m at the high points of my optimism or low points of my exhaustion. Hopefully I come out balanced that way… 🙂

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  10. What an interesting post. I write at different times of the day, which I’m (thankfully) able to do in this phase of my life where I’m not employed. I usually do a little bit in the morning as I’m sipping coffee, then later in the afternoon, after I get done with stuff around the house and/or errands, I will sit down and hammer away at new blog posts. I get what you’re saying about being “salty”; I often worry that comes out too much in my writing. I don’t know that everyone gets my sarcasm. But we are all works in progress, right?

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    1. All works in progress, yes! I love that you can write at different times of the day. It’s funny because I don’t find you to be sarcastic – but maybe I’m not reading at my saltiest… 🙂

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  11. I love the comments, am or pm designation or grumpy writer or optimistic author. If I did that though, my readers might start to see that I’m grumpy most of the time. Ha, ha. Yes, I guess we all censor ourselves to a certain extent, but the end of the day I love that you’re honest with your writing Wynne, that part comes through day to day!!! Keep writing!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Oh, thank you, Brian. But I just don’t see you as grumpy so perhaps you are keeping that to yourself. However I echo that your authenticity comes through regardless of your mood!

      Liked by 1 person

  12. I don’t like this one, Wynne. I love it. Thanks for sharing your salty side. Salted caramel, vanilla ice cream mixed with pretzels—great combinations and all delicious!

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Wow, this one hit home, especially today because I just finished writing a post with a wicked cold. Not my best or most positive work. I enjoy writing when I’m feeling calm and peaceful but sometimes it just doesn’t happen that way. I do agree we need both sugar and salt when we expose our thoughts to the world. It does add its own sort of flavor. Great post! Hugs, C

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Oh, I love how you put things, Cheryl! It does add its own flavor indeed! Hope your wicked cold goes and takes a jump in the lake. Sending you huge hugs!

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  14. I enjoyed reading this post again Wynne. Thinking about your Wise and Shine post, I’ll have to think about what my mission statement is. It’s an interesting exercise to think about doing!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Oh, Ab – you are so kind to comment. I was thinking that this repost might just give you a day off from commenting since you always do such a beautiful job! As far as a mission statement goes – you’ve always made the great point that it’s great self-care!

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Interesting that you should write about writing; something everyone blogging would be intrigued with. I know I was. Excellent read! What time of day to write? I’m sure it varies.

    Liked by 2 people

  16. I love this glimpse into how you and your muse interface! thank you. I have a couple (several actually) of quotes pinned on the wall in front of my desk that inform what I end up posting. One from a fellow blogger..she told me this several years ago when I was second guessing myself, she said, “Write about what interests you, and do the best job you can. Publish it, and then move on to the next thing. (If you don’t move on, you risk one of two things, if your piece is good, you’ll spend too much time patting yourself o the back. If it’s bad, you’ll beat yourself up. Write, and let go.) If people offer comments or criticism, consider them but don’t be ruled by them. For heaven’s sake, don’t worry about the numbers.”

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Oh, that’s great advice, DM. Do the best you can, write it, and let it go. I appreciate this glimpse into what surrounds your writing space and how you do it.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. And thank you for including me in your May’s Greatest Hits list. Saw that last night on my e-mail notification. You are so thoughtful!

        Liked by 2 people

  17. Pingback: The Writer's Mission Statement - Wise & Shine

  19. I think you write when time is downtime and you are okay with it. I just finished my first novel “The Bayou Heist” and it was published by Barringer Publishing. It was several years in the making. Once I took a leave from the school district, I had the time for edits. The leave had nothing to do with my book and more to do with my right hip and a few other unresolved things. The timing was perfect as the book is now available on Amazon and I am happy!

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  20. I like the idea of writing in the morning before the day proper begins. Dorothea Brande in her book Becoming A Writer advises writing before you’ve done anything or spoken to anyone in order to bring out what’s lurking in your subconscious.

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  21. I’d love to write in the morning when my muse and my body is fresh, but unfortunately I’m not a morning person. It takes me a while to wake up. I go on auto-pilot getting ready for work in the mornings. My drive to work may see some ideas start to float through my head, and if they’re good enough, I’ll note them in my phone… I try to do this quickly at stop-lights!

    I usually write in the middle of the day on breaks, or in the evenings after dinner, when I feel sated with food, and before my eyes start to get heavy before bed… sometimes that window is quite small!

    I write in spits and spurts when I have the time and energy. If my head can’t focus to write but my hands need to keep busy, I keep crafts at the ready to work on… that also may lead to needing to write something down when my mind wanders in free-association.

    Definitely a process!

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