Sunday Funnies: Dec 4th

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Another installment from my dad’s humor cards.

The backstory: My dad was a Presbyterian pastor for 40 years. He kept a well curated stack of humor cards – little stories he heard, found or saw and then typed onto 5×7 cards. Then he wrote in the margins when he used that particular item. His humor was often an easy way to settle in to something deeper – by laughing and thinking about the buried truth in these little nuggets, it paved the way to an open heart.

When we cleaned out his desk after he died 7 years ago, I was lucky enough to stumble on this stack. I pull it out regularly to have a little laugh with my dear Dad. Now when I post one of them, I write my note next to his and it feels like a continuation.

Persistence

A duck enters a bar and asks for duck food. The bartender says, “We don’t have any and we don’t serve ducks, now get out of here!”

The next day the ducks returns and asks for duck food. The bartender replies hotly, “I told you ‘no.’ Now get out and if you come back I’ll nail those web feet to the floor.”

The following day, the duck returns and asks, “Do you have any nails?” The bartender answers, “No.” Then the duck asks, “Then do you have any duck food?”

47 thoughts on “Sunday Funnies: Dec 4th”

    1. Thanks for the encouragement, Todd. I’m not quite sure where he got these although I suspect this one he made up because I remember him trying it out on me one day as we were out walking my dog. But thank you for giving me an inspirational nudge!

      Liked by 3 people

    1. What a sweet and lovely idea. I am never quite sure where my dad got these – he didn’t do attribution very well on these cards. I think he made up this one because I clearly remember him telling me it (which makes it very fun to type up and post) but the other ones?? I suppose I could do the research. Anyway, thanks for the encouragement, my friend! ❤

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    2. And in that spirit, here’s one I heard:
      Daughter: I just saw 2 ducks in our back yard!
      Mother: That’s not possible!
      Daughter: Why’s that?
      Mother: Because that would be a pair-o-ducks (I heard it, so it was clear it was: paradox :D)

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  6. Oh, I have no doubt that you DO, or you wouldn’t be writing daily blogs and responding to a bazillion comments every day—oh, and raising two children, and earning a living, and supporting others, and and and . . . You are persistence rolled up into a dynamic ball that gathers no moss as it goes along it’s way.

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  16. Hahaha, this was a wonderfully dry one. I can imagine getting someone with a deadpan delivery to pull this one off. You should totally try stand-up with your father’s material. It takes a special someone to know how to pull off humour in writing, which is why I’ve always been intrigued by the jokes your dad wrote ever since I read the first post of this series!

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    1. OMG – I sense some “try something new” from your latest post in this comment, Stuart. I don’t think I could pull off stand-up comedy but you are delightful for suggesting it. And just to clarify about my dad’s material – I’m not sure where he got it. Sometimes he put attributions on the cards, sometimes he didn’t but I’m doubtful he wrote the stuff without attributions. Some I think he did (and I suspect this duck joke is one) but I think some was stuff he’d heard but didn’t know the source of.

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