Nice to Meet You

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“A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love.” – Stendahl

My kids and I have had a dog staying with us this past week. Kelty is a delightful, well-trained Springer Spaniel who at 12 ½ is old enough to pretty much know what to do without direction and deaf enough to have momentary lapses when she wants to look for food and pretend she can’t hear us. My kids have been so excited to take care of a dog so they’ve split up the responsibilities. My 6-year-old daughter scoops the food for her and gives the cup to my 2-year-old son so he can put it in the dish. Or my son goes around the yard looking for poop so that my daughter can pick it up. Hilarious!

The only creature that isn’t happy is our cat who refuses to even meet the dog. She has spent the week lying mostly on the front porch glider occasionally coming in for food or to run upstairs where the dog doesn’t go to have a nap. She’s young, strong and confident enough to roam the entire neighborhood, catch mice and take care of herself but none of that translates until a willingness to meet this nice older dog, She even follows us when we take the dog out walking like she wants to join but darts away if the dog looks at her.

Somehow this has reminded me of me. Specifically about my willingness to meet men. Not that I dart into bushes 😊 but more figuratively that if I am ever to find love again, I’m going to have to start with at least intending to meet men. I’ve had the confidence to walk this path of having kids on my own, I’ve managed to figure out how to juggle most everything – work, house maintenance, kids but the idea of falling in love again unsettles me.

I was playing a catching game with my kids the other day and my daughter said to me, “When we get a dad, we can play boys against girls.” Right! I know it’s the next part of the path I need to walk but like the cat, it’s never going to happen unless I need to try. Maybe at my age, I can find one a little like the dog – old enough to pretty much know what to do and selectively deaf enough to create some mischief from time to time. 😊

13 thoughts on “Nice to Meet You”

  2. My goodness. I have no idea what it would be like to try to look for a man these days, and a good one at that. Where does one even begin? Work? The grocery store? But I can see how it could also be fun. Does anything beat falling in love??

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    1. All great questions, Betsy! I’m in the envisioning phase which I take to mean that I don’t have to really look anywhere but just imagine that I could find one. At some point I assume that I might have to move into a more active phase but I’m hoping a man falls out of the sky and lands on my head before I get to that point. 🙂 But you are right, nothing beats falling in love. I used to be really good at that so I hope it’s like riding a bike!

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      1. Like riding a bike! Haha. And how do you manage falling back out of love? I’m honestly curious. I married my first boyfriend, so… ?? Tell me what it’s like. Is it horrible? Still worth it?
        And maybe someone will find you when you’re not looking. That would be great. That’s how it worked out for me, and I’m grateful, because I’m not the looking sort. At least I wasn’t then. If I had to do it again at my age… Hmm…

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      3. You married your first boyfriend? Wow, that’s a good blog post story if I’ve ever heard of one! Falling back out of love is no problem – you just are so shitty to each other for long enough that it’s totally easy to imagine how being alone would be better. I’m kidding…sorta! Maybe it’s more that you decode all the things that they told you. Like my ex-husband had been married previously when I met him. He told me that his first wife had a jealousy problem. It turned out that it was more like he had a fidelity problem. 🙂 Now that I’m so far past it, I find this to be hilarious that I believed that in the first place but I think this level of knowing is what makes dating at age 52 a little daunting. It’s pretty easy to meet someone, spot a single character trait that leads to 30 seconds imagining how the whole thing would go including the end and then smile and turn away before even exchanging last names. 🙂

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      4. That’s a great idea about the tattoo! That’ll attract all the right attention! It just came in the mail today. I’m going to let my 6-yr-old apply it since she’s the one that loves tattoos!! And I’ll definitely post a picture. Thank you!

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  3. Like a cat has nine lives, there’s always a new opportunity to find love again when you are ready to put yourself back out there again. Good luck! 🤞🏻👍

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  4. Only just now seeing your replies to my comments on this post! Reading your other posts, I remembered that I hadn’t seen your responses here. Glad I came and looked! (Not sure how I missed them in my notifications.) So sorry about your experience with your ex. If only you could’ve asked HIS ex what the problem was. Maybe she could’ve given you the 411 on his fidelity issues. It was good of his friend to tell you he was cheating before you wasted any more time on him. I guess having good reason to dislike someone makes the split easier. Marrying my first boyfriend meant I’ve never been dumped, but I still had the unrequited love (or at least strong like) thing happen beforehand, and that was hard enough.

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    1. I remember a friend saying when she got married that it freed up a part of her brain not having to think about dating any longer. That must be why you are so funny and talented – you were able to skip all that waste of brainpower AND make what is clearly an excellent choice as your husband seems fun! But sorry about the unrequited love – yep, that stings! I was going to say something about the woes of youth but then realized that it could happen to me again one day since I’m single. But nah, I’m still counting on my falling from the sky plan. 🙂

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