Deep Contentment

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“In some ways, it is natural for us to wish that God had designed us a less glorious and less arduous destiny; but then we are wishing not for more love but less.” – C.S. Lewis

Things are going great. I was handed a new job so providentially that I would have been thumbing my nose at the Universe to turn it down. We’re getting a new puppy, and dogs are one of my favorite things on this planet. My kids and I just returned from a beautiful week of vacation and we are healthy, centered, and bonded.

I mention all this not to celebrate the good fortune but as a back drop for what comes next. I mean, celebrating the good fortune is also worth doing, but it’s not what I’m getting at here. It’s that I experience a lot of moments as I’m looking down this future thinking, “Holy crap, how is all this going to work?” My excitement for what is to come is peppered with sharp spikes of anxiety. I know it’ll be a lot of work and there are going to be tough moments, but I don’t know what they will be.

This is when I realize that faith is as important in the up times as well as the down. My dad once told me what he wished for his kids in terms of faith, “But life has been so rich for me because of what I have come to know of God through Jesus that on that level I yearn for you to know the same deep contentment and certainty that you belong to God and God loves you.”

It’s his phrase “deep contentment” that keeps coming back to me when I feel anxious. To watch my dad navigate life – the ups and the downs was to see what deep contentment looks like. It looks like someone who made life seem easy. It looks like someone who had an incredibly deep well of grace and love for others. It looks like someone who was centered, focused, accomplished an incredible amount, all the while, smiling with this knowing gleam in his eye.

In 2005, David Foster Wallace gave an incredible commencement speech at Kenyon College. It included this,

“You get to consciously decide what has meaning and what doesn’t. You get to decide what to worship. In the day-to day trenches of adult life, there is actually no such thing as atheism. There is no such thing as not worshipping. Everybody worships. The only choice we get is what to worship.”

David Foster Wallace

David Foster Wallace’s speech, combined with the words from my dad, reminds me that I get to choose my faith, and use it to fuel my contentment both when life is good and when life is hard. When I do that enough times, I become less buffeted by the winds of fortune, whether they be up or down, and I start to find deep contentment of my own.

For a sister post about anxiety, please read my Heart of the Matter post: Borrowing Trouble.

For more about my dear dad, I’ve written a book that is available on Amazon: Finding My Father’s Faith

The quote for today post came from Mitch Teemley, Less Glory, Please?

(featured photo from Pexels)

38 thoughts on “Deep Contentment”

  1. The challenges do make life interesting. Whatever comes, I imagine you will weather it and grow. Your dad’s faith sounds rather like a sturdy oar with which to guide the boat. Good luck on the new job, Wynne! Let any unexpected wetness keep you cool.

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  2. Oh, I would love to win the Powerball and Mega Millions lotteries, but I think you’ve touched on the real goal of life: deep ongoing contentment. When I’m able to get even a piece of that through life’s ups and downs . . . then I get a feeling inside that’s unlike any other. Love todays’ two posts Wynne. They say so much.

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  4. Your dad gave you a wonderful example of teaching about a God who is loving, gives grace and is supportive, vs. a vengeful, wrathful God who punishes for any infraction. What a wonderful blessing to have had this experience and now to be able to continue to share his message. Priceless.

    This is that message about God that too many aren’t hearing, and who get overwhelmed as a result… (ask how I know).

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      1. Yes, that is the unfortunate reality for the majority of churches and people who frequent them. A friend recently said to me if someone says they “fear God” they don’t really know God, for our Creator is all about lovie.

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  5. As they say, Wynne—”You’ve got this!” Sometimes when it’s hard to keep the faith for one’s self, if helps if others can jump in and keep it for you. Whatever’s coming your way, you will ace it! Something I’ve discovered along the way, though—sometimes before acing it happens, mistakes are made. But if they can be part of then experience, they can serve to speed the process along to a happy conclusion for all. I’m with you Wynne—keeping the faith!

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    1. I think you just described a great aspect of friendship – people who are willing to jump in and keep the faith for you. And yes, mistakes will be made but that’s okay too. Thanks, Julia!

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  6. Ooh, I love the idea of deep contentment, and really this entire piece, Wynne. I know several people who seem to be living life on easy mode, even when faced with challenges – I suspect it’s their ability to find contentment anywhere that helps them coast along gracefully, It’s an attitude and approach worth striving toward.

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  7. There is quite a background on David Foster Wallace, both in the speech he gave but also in his personal life as Google tells me. I look at just those words in the quote and see a deep meaning that worship can mean many things and where we put our trust and belief is highly independent to the individual. I went on to read the rest of his writing that contains that quote and you can see aspects into the darkness he was facing.

    Faith itself can come from a variety of places and manifest in our lives in different ways. I hope you continue to grow content Wynne as you journey down this new path in your career.

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    1. Yes, isn’t David Foster Wallace fascinating? Oh, and he was so funny too. I remember a description he wrote of playing tennis in the midwest as a 12-year-old when a wind storm blew him against the fence. He claimed there was a lasting impression of him on that fence. But he was even funnier.

      Right – faith and worship come from so many different places and sources. Well said, Deb! Thanks for the well wishes!

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  8. I’m glad you had a wonderful vacation and feel so centered. Our next door neighbor showed us his new puppy this morning. He’s been a mess since he had to put down his dog. We often find him crying in his front yard as he waters his plants in the early mornings. I’m so happy for him. Also, I bought your book for my Aunt who went to the UW. She said Earl Palmer was at Calvin Club when she was there. She is enjoying your book so much.

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    1. Thank you for buying a copy of my book for your aunt. How touching and thoughtful, Elizabeth! I love that your neighbor has a new puppy. It’s so hard to lose our beloved pets!! 🙂 ❤

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  9. The Wallace quote and the paragraph right after are phenomenally timed reads for me!

    I walked into some profound discomfort yesterday, which discomfort … had faded by morning, leaving me instead feeling grateful for what I learned because I did something new. I became aware just how much I don’t–woohoo!–have to keep doing the old, habitual thing.

    To lean into the new thing? That’s me consciously deciding what I want, now, to worship. 🙂

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    1. Consciously deciding what to worship – yes. If it’s going to happen, that’s exactly how it should be, right? And I love your description of discomfort showing us what we want to change! Thanks, Deb!

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  11. I love your honesty, always: “My excitement for what is to come is peppered with sharp spikes of anxiety.” What a statement…and yet I think it’s that preparedness that helps us sail through the rough waters if/when they arrive. Still…a good night’s sleep is pretty terrific, too. 😉 It makes the bumps less spike-y, right? xo!

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  12. I love this post, Wynne, and the philosophy of leaning into faith to fuel your life both when it is good and bad. We often indeed turn to faith when things are dire, but there’s also something magical and uplifting about leaning into it when things are good.

    I wish you the best with the new job, new puppy and all the changes ahead!

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  13. Wynne, congratulations on your new career opportunity, soon to be fur-child, good health and well-being! Never stop celebrating your good life and sharing it with me!!!! And of course, I must praise your father’s advice – I like him a bunch!!!

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  14. Wynne, this took a direct route right into my heart. I’ve been wanting to “get back here to your place” for the last few days. You’ve been on my mind, I’ve so enjoyed you last visits and I’m so glad I made it this morning!
    Your dad sounds so much like my own, and it brings memories of him back. How I miss him because of his “deep contentment” and so much more. You know something? It was in writing his stories together at the end of his life that I realized God was cementing my own faith. I’m just finishing another book about a missionary couple now in their 80s. It’s been such a great privilege. (Anything that was still a lose or rattling has received another good dose of cement.) It’s such a beautiful thing to capture the wisdom and understanding of those who have gone before us and modeled well-lived lives for us, those who we know have already heard, “Job well done good and faithful servant.” Thanks for the heads up on your book. I’ll head over there today to pick up a copy. I feel like we could talk all day these things! ❤️ Thank you and congratulations on your new job! I look forward to hearing more about it— 🥰 ❤️❤️
    Deb

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    1. What a wonderful comment, Deb. I love the similarities in our dads and our paths. And I’m smiling about your book about the missionaries helping to give another dose of cement. What a great way to describe it! I’ve just found your book about your dad on Amazon and look forward to reading it. You’re right – I think we could probably talk all day about these things! Thanks for the great comment!

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      1. Aww, you make it east. That’s so nice you looked up my book. ❤️(I would love to hear about your publishing journey. I learned a lot on my first book.) I’ll be starting a new journey with this book.

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  15. That might be what we’re all searching for is “deep contentment,” and even when we find it, sporadically in my case, it can be sprinkled with bouts of anxiety. I think that is human or part of the human condition until we understand life like your dad did, with total acceptance and a heart full of love. Great post as always Wynne. I’m excited for your puppy and how that will add to your “growing family.” Here’s to a fabulous August. Hugs, C

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    1. I love your beautiful ability to get what I’m saying and add that one or two things extra that help expand it. You’re right – I think deep contentment might be what we all are searching for. And then we tighten up and lose it, only to have to look for it again. I love your formula – total acceptance and a heart full of love.

      P.S. We met the puppy for the first time tonight. So cute!!Sending love to you — W

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  16. I thought you were attributing that quote to David Foster, musician and composer, whose 1993 Christmas album features my all-time favorite rendition of “O Holy Night,” performed by Michael Crawford. I get chills just thinking about that masterful performance.

    Alas, you are referring to a dead writer/professor. No shade to the dead writer/professor, of course. But I doubt he was able to sing “O Holy Night” anywhere near as beautifully as Michael Crawford did on David Foster’s 1993 Christmas album.

    Let it snow indeed.

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